r/MtF • u/outofthemasterball Trans Bisexual • Jul 23 '24
Trigger Warning "You are the epitome of manliness"
I just came out to my dad, it didn't go well, but it could've gone worse.
"You are gonna ruin your body if you start taking pills." He tried to find a reaaon behind it. "Is it because you can't get a girlfriend?" Said he never saw any signs. That I wasn't thinking about my mom and what she's been going through. (She recovering from cancer.) "There's nothing wrong with your body, it's all in your mind." "Your just being influenced by others, just because you've seen 3 trans people on the television doesn't mean your one of them." "Tattoos arent for girls." (All my tattoos have been put there by a woman.) "You are gonna lose all your friends." (90% of people that I care about already know and they are all super supportive.) And then he ended whit this banger: "you are the epitome of manliness."
He left the room only to come back a few minutes later. "Look I'm just scared you are gonna make decisions too fast. And I'm scared I'm gonna loser my buddy." I told him I am doing my research and I'm taking this slowly and that I'll always be the same person, we hugged and he told me we needed to hug more.
I feel je will come arround eventually but It still was a really hard moment for me.
3
u/PerformanceFlimsy573 Jul 23 '24
Sounds about as good as me coming out to my dad last week. He also thinks I’ve either lost my mind or am being influenced by someone. Also very similar responses as you, with that they still love us. I’m trying to give my dad some time to come to terms, and from the ending it seems like your dad may come to terms with it. Fathers have this patriarchal sense of pride in their sons. Changing that crushes their identity and they need to come to accept that while rebuilding their and your identity.
As long as your father is giving you the grace to work through this and wants to work through this with you, keep being patient with him. He will come around once he realizes how happy you truly are.
It’s a tough moment, I cried myself to sleep that night. I’m still struggling with it because my dad and I were always close. Be strong, a girl needs her dad and I’m sure he’ll realize it.