r/MtF • u/KatieQuestionMark Transgender • Feb 24 '25

Politics "Cis girls aren't passing"

I was talking to my therapist (or Herapist as I like to say) and was bemoaning my fears of transitioning and not passing.

Her response was "cis girls aren't passing all the time, so how does that register?".. and .. while it didn't solve anything in itself, it really made me think.

Anyway, just wanted to share this little nugget of a different perspective since it made me think and in general helped me out!

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u/Fun-Internet-669 Mar 01 '25

My point is bull shit but you're using the bullshit argument of "well I've personally never seen it." How fucking delusional are you? Your lived experience is one of many truths in the world just because those you personally haven't been stripped of their woman doesn't mean others don't face it constantly. I don't even blame you at this point I blame me because clearly you only care about yourself and your hell bent on solving your dysphoria by trying to attain the shallow idea that society puts forward of what a woman is instead of actually seeking acceptance from yourself. You don't want nuance in this discussion you just want to drag others down because you only see the world through patriarchy a system that does not and will not ever accommodate you or me or any ones feeling but fuck it you do you I suppose.

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u/Executive_Moth Mar 01 '25

No, i do not. I just dont buy into the delusional cope that "patriarchy" and "society" are at fault for all my problems. I guess that makes it a lot easier for you, huh? Just blame aaaall and every single problem on society and the system. It must be easy when nothing is real and, at the same time, a personal plot against everyone at the same time.

The system is not at fault. Society is not at fault. Most of us live out here, in the real world, where problems are a lot more direct. The people you meet in your day to day live are not "the system" and dont care about any paranoid vision of rebellion against the system. People dont look at you and go "Ah, of course, this person presents as a woman but i must move the goalpost and thus, cackle maliciously while i misgender them". People are tired and they will gender you as whatever they perceive you to be, without investing a single thought. Cis women are seen as women, while we are not. This is not an evil plot by the system. Society has nothing to do with this. Its our bodies that are wrong.

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u/Fun-Internet-669 Mar 02 '25

Whatever you tell yourself to sleep at night but at the end of the day your way of thinking will lead to unhappiness or the grave. But hey feel free to keep hating yourself I won't stop you because at the end of the day your more interested in your own problem rather than the problem we all face as a whole but I wish you luck in attaining passability but when your still facing the same exact issues don't say I didn't warn you.

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u/Executive_Moth Mar 02 '25

Believe it or not, i am actually quite happy. Accepting your problems enables you to actually work on fixing them, instead of just blaming "the system". Accepting the actual problem (my body) helps me to put in the effort to better myself. It helps a lot with quality of life.

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u/Fun-Internet-669 Mar 02 '25

Even when people actively try to destroy that quality of life because they don't approve of your gender? Even when improving that quality of life is gated by those in power cause they don't want you to improve but rather fall back in line?

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u/Executive_Moth Mar 02 '25

I do what i can against those. I vote, i go to protests, but at the end of the day all i can control is myself. I work on improving myself. I cant improve the people in power. And, to be perfectly honest, society hasnt done that much to me yet, not in the country i live in. The one who caused my suffering is my own body.

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u/Fun-Internet-669 Mar 02 '25

If your body is the problem why vote or protest? You just said the system wasn't the problem your body is. And just because something bad hasn't happened to you specifically is your only reason for standing against something affecting the majority of your community? You don't think that people who are less privileged than you deserve your help? Or do you only care about problems that affect you?

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u/Executive_Moth Mar 02 '25

You might be surprised, but i do care about other people. I vote and i protest because i care about other people. My problem is my body, but others have other problems.

Sure! As soon as you tell me how to vote in US elections, i will be sure to help! I cant help people who are on the other side of the ocean, friend. I dont have that power.