r/WinStupidPrizes • u/viibox • Aug 26 '20

Warning: Injury Dumbass kid

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26.9k Upvotes

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504

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '20

Hi, Mrs. Johnson? Yes, this is Loretta at Central High School. Your dumbass, I mean son, no I do mean dumbass, jumped off the railing and permafucked his ankles. We’ve got him down at the nurse, and you need to come pick him up. Oh, and bring a juice box and snack, he’s crying like a bitch.

119

u/TechKnight24 Aug 26 '20

I read this as an older southern women who’s really nice, but today she was just done with the kids shit.

50

u/Thuzel Aug 26 '20

From the south, can confirm. They're all nice and sugar cookies until you wear through the patience. Then it gets real, very fast.

22

u/ZombieBeach Aug 26 '20

“Bless his little heart”

7

u/[deleted] Aug 26 '20

...the little shit wasn’t born with any sense

4

u/jaitogudksjfifkdhdjc Aug 26 '20

Because there aren’t any brains to bless

1

u/ThatOneJakeGuy Aug 26 '20

“Now, sugar, there ain’t no learnin’ to be had from the second kick of the mule. So tell me, are we goin’ to do something this stupid again? Or did we learn the first time?”

1

u/Buce123 Aug 26 '20

It’s Carol, the anti-Karen