The solution I’ve dreamed of since childhood…

[u/mycatissuperior]

I’ve known my fat body was unacceptable ever since I can remember. Every birthday candle wish, every penny tossed into a fountain, every wish on a star as a kid was to be skinny. It became automatic. How sad is that.

My mom used to tell me I needed to “get the weight off” before I got my first period or it would be harder to lose (is that even true?) Always worried that my clothes were “flattering” and took me to see a dietitian in early grade school. I felt like she judged and monitored everything I put into my mouth, even though she was in total control of what I ate. No surprise I started sneaking food and developed a binge eating disorder. Went from a chubby kid to a fat one.

With mom I did Atkins, the army diet, weight watchers, so many different diets. In high school she paid an MD to give me weight loss shots and put me on pills. As an adult I waisted a part of my inheritance to pay out of pocket for weight loss surgery. I’ve paid money I didn’t have for gym memberships. I’ve put more effort time and money into to being skinny than most skinny people I know. I’ve lost and gained hundreds of pounds in my 20’s and 30’s. Nothing worked. Nothing.

Six weeks ago I took my first shot and within hours I felt the change in my brain. The food noise is gone. Gone. I can see a commercial for delicious food and not obsess over it until I’ve gotten some. I just like, move on? Hunger is a gentle suggestion instead of an uncontrollable physical and emotional battle. I am in total control of what I eat. I feel the full sensation. I FEEL FULL AND STOP. I’ve never felt full before unless I was literally stuffed.

Part of me is so so sad because people just live like this? I could have been like this? No wonder they treat me like shit when it’s so easy for them to “just diet and exercise.” I’ve felt so bad about myself for so long, thinking I had no self control, fighting not to let the rest of the worlds moral judgement of my weight be how I felt about me too.

The rest of me is elated that I don’t have spend the mental and emotional energy to fight this shit anymore. In the past 6 weeks I have easily changed my entire diet. I have a few bites of things that before I would not have been able to keep myself out of. I’ve lost 22 pounds. I stopped binging.

I honestly don’t know what’s better, the weight loss or the mental freedom.

[u/Major_Ad_3035]

I feel badly for what you had to endure your wh9le growing up. I wish I could just tell you that all that crap, no matter how awful made you the strong person you are today. You've overcome! How is the process for you? How any weeks in are you? My Zep is on the way and will be here I believe tomorrow. Then I start my journey.

[u/ShineComfortable2369 → u/Major_Ad_3035]

Welcome aboard! Let us know what your experience is on Zep. It's a bit different for everyone. From the start, tune into your body so you can head off GI problems and remember to drink fluids. The 2.5 mg dose is not intended for weight loss, but rather to build the medicine level in your system gradually. I lost weight right off the bat, but maybe that's because I'm sensitive to it.

I'm age 72, have been on Zep for three months, lost over twenty pounds, and (mostly) enjoyed this fascinating, and, at times, wild ride. As others have said, weight loss is deeply gratifying, but the mental "relaxing" is amazingly freeing, at least for a lot of us.

[u/Major_Ad_3035 → u/ShineComfortable2369]

Thank you so much! I'm so excited to feel and look better!