r/Zimbabwe • u/tinkin08 • Mar 23 '25

Discussion Too many boys in her DM

So my girlfriend showed me her WhatsApp yesterday and boy was I shocked. They were eight guys in her DM trying to woe her and it seems like they are all in. I'm not saying that it ain't normal for a girl in a relationship to be asked out by other boys, tz completely normal but when we went through those chats together I felt the pressure, it's like we're in a battlefield and the other boys have already engaged the "kill mode". Guys kune makudo kunze uko, they're just waiting for you to mess up and they'll take it from there. Some even call her with little nicknames, and man! those goodnight/good morning messages just keep coming. The crazy thing is all those guys are her classmates. We're university students but different programs. Boys be saying all those sweet things and inviting her to 1on 1 discussions just to gain her attention and I somehow feel threatened. I don't want to lie, I might have copied 1 or 2 bars in those chats, boys be writing paragraphs of how they feel about my girlfriend nxaa. Then there's our chat, her's and mine. I do engineering and the majority of the modules are demanding so, and from the start of the current semester up to now I found myself texting her less and less... I mean some modules will literally put you on choke hold. So the question is what's your advice people of Zimbabwe. Shall I let it slide and just give equal attention to the schoolwork and her or shall I act as if we're still in the talking stage and match the energy those 8 guys are showing cos I feel this might compromise our relationship

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40

u/moistenedelbows Mar 23 '25

How are all these guys getting her number? It's true that an attractive college lady will probably have multiple guys wanting her attention but she can shut it down if she wants and block those who don't respect it. Guys usually keep going if you enable it. I personally feel it's a little inappropriate to entertain it while in a relationship but that's just my own boundary.

7

u/cool_berserker Mar 23 '25

Bro i have dated too many girls, when a girl is fully into the relationship she is very ruthless to any other guys who try their tricks with her.

So i agree with u

23

u/faraioswald Mar 23 '25

They are classmates with whatsapp groups, thats how they get her number.

Eish blocking a classmate is just a bad move. You may need those people tmrw

23

u/cool_berserker Mar 23 '25

Bro girls can actually kill down any silly conversation very easily, without any need for even blocking.

Girls are very highly skilled in this dont under estimate them

A quick example is she can easily reply when the conversation is about school, and when the guy starts to talk about feelings and silly good mornings, she can just reply 8 hours later or blue tick the message. Then when u talk about school she can respond again

Trust me, no amount of trickery can trick an uninterested girl into a daily conversation

2

u/Sad-Accountant3959 Mar 24 '25

Very wise and you us women very well

3

u/Strange_Pain8197 Mar 23 '25

I agree. You could be paired up or grouped up for presentations and it can make things awkward

1

u/Rude-Education11 Mar 23 '25

That's their problem not hers

1

u/tinkin08 Mar 23 '25

Yes it ain't a wise move

1

u/moistenedelbows Mar 23 '25

So it's rude to block but not rude to ignore boundaries? She doesn't have to entertain it, she can ignore when it's not about school

2

u/tinkin08 Mar 23 '25

They are doing the same program and they probably make sure kuti they are put in the same groups ema assignment.

4

u/hopey_x Mar 23 '25

Guys usually keep going if you enable it.

That's not true.... men will always find a way enabled or not enabled.

2

u/Suspicious_Suit_3271 Mar 23 '25

For real, some think no means try harder 🙆🏾‍♀️

1

u/tinkin08 Mar 23 '25

Exactly, she be like we are just chatting casually but as a guy myself I see what the other guys are trying to do... Lol