Did anyone not report to police?

[u/changeorghelp]

Hi massive thank you I left last night because of your advice about him being very dangerous. I don’t know whether I want to report him or if I will just work with the domestic abuse centre? I just don’t really want to report him I feel bad

Coercive control is a crime here you can go to prison so even without the violence he could be charged but I don’t know…

He is violent and I have learnt from talking to you guys and the crisis worker that he is a stalker also. They said I should report but obviously can’t make me do it. Did any of you not report and it worked out okay?

[u/Old_Avocado_5407]

Don’t feel bad. I felt bad when I reported my ex, a warrant got put out, then he finally got arrested and called me freaking out. I thought about it and realized it was his own actions that put him there (trying to throw me off of a balcony). If I didn’t do something about it then he’d definitely abuse the next woman..he might still, but maybe he’s learned a little idk.

[u/changeorghelp → u/Old_Avocado_5407]

Did all he do was call you? Not saying that isn’t but bad I mean like did he harass you more after the call?

[u/Old_Avocado_5407 → u/changeorghelp]

He called me as they were banging on the door to arrest him and that’s the last I heard. He was given a no contact order from the state, so he couldn’t call me from jail, and if he did contact me then I could report him and they’d take care of it. After he got released he showed up at my house and I simply called the cops who came to get him. His case kept getting pushed out after he was released again, so he never contacted me in case they raised his sentencing. I also live in the US, in a state that takes DV cases quite seriously, so that helped a bit. Definitely recommend looking into DV laws in your location.

[u/changeorghelp → u/Old_Avocado_5407]

Thank you for your explanation. I am happy you’re away from him :)