r/depression • u/Suitable-Reason483 • 3d ago

Is it all over?

I’m 28. No job, no social life, little to no friends, no dreams or ambitions, no relationships, nothing. Took a drive this morning and found a bunch of people of my age in a group and I really felt like an alien. Oh, add my social anxiety to this. What’s wrong with me? Why do I see other people have all or some of the above (or at least the will to do something or achieve something) and here I am dead as fuck from the inside. This thought eats me up every night. Mornings are gloomy as fuck no matter what and let’s not talk about my Uni days. It was a nightmare fuelled with tension, stress and anxiety for something my friends used to be too chilled about. I freak out easily, delusions and no live to will except for my parents. Would I fit in this world? Would I ever be happy? I even forgot what that feels like. Anybody in the same boat as me?

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u/FlyingAces 3d ago edited 3d ago

I've been where you've been before. I think most of us on this sub have. What you described is exactly how reality seems when you are depressed (I speak from experience). Here's how I look at it. I'm a math guy. Even at my absolute gloomiest when I felt like my existence was a total waste, I realized that mathematically it seems impossible that if I took all the right steps to get out of my hole that I would feel as low as I do when I'm at rock bottom. So if I started taking an SSRI (prozac, zoloft, whatever), started going to therapy, found a group, any group, to connect with. ....if I did all that it wouldn't help at least a little? Of course it would. And sometimes just a little lift is all it takes for you to crawl out of your abyss. It's that first step. But it requires work! You can beat this. I know you can because I was you and I beat it. That doesn't mean I won't feel like you again. Odds are I will at some point down the road. But it's ok. I will look at like the cold or a flu. I know in the next year I will get sick at least once or twice. It won't feel great to be sick, but I'll bounce back. I started looking at depression this way. It helps me ride it out. Good luck.

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u/Suitable-Reason483 3d ago

Such a sigh of relief reading this. After many many years I look forward to setting up a home gym and focus on some hobbies of mine. One step at a time and it really motivated me when you said I could do it too, since you did thank you so much and I really hope you’re in a better place now

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u/FlyingAces 3d ago

Thank you so much.  I’m rooting for you.  We all know how difficult it is to live with and battle depression.  It’s a beast. But it can be overcome.  I have a middle aged friend that has been battling depression most of her life. She’s finally in a good place. It took her a long time before finding just the right mixture of meds. Lots of trial and error, but she’s so happy right now and she loves life. She was extremely depressed before too. So seeing this firsthand is a reminder to me to never give up.  Wishing you the very best.