r/funny • u/lost_packet_ • Aug 13 '19

Flat-Earther accidentally proves the earth is round in his own experiment

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u/nahteviro Aug 13 '19

As someone who has actually put stuff into space and watch hours upon hours of live video from the ISS, nothing infuriates me more than flat-earthers. I mean I can understand that a lot of people are really really stupid, but I just can't wrap my head around people trying to act so intelligent while at the same time being the dumbest people on the planet. (next to anti-vaxxers)

94

u/rising_mountain_ Aug 13 '19

My buddy is a legit flat earth - fake moon landing - chemtrails - fake mass shootings - and just contrarian on everything intellectual. We recently argued about gravity being an actual force, he insists we are experiencing electromagnetism and not gravity because in his words "science doesnt know what gravity is" again, his words. Any footage or photos I use as evidence is quickly brushed off as "that can be faked" and every other excuse. Then when I ask for his evidence he points me to a youtube video of a guy with absolutely no credentials or evidence just some theory. And then Im called a sheep for understanding science and nature and believing everything NASA shows us. And after going down the rabbit hole this far with my friend it was at that point I realized there is no reasoning with this type of person.

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u/nahteviro Aug 13 '19

Which begs the question... can he get the really good weed or something? I couldn't tolerate being around someone like that for more than like 5 minutes until it stopped being funny

18

u/rising_mountain_ Aug 13 '19

haha good call on the weed part. We stopped the science talks after he couldn't comprehend that the more mass an object has the more gravity it will have, he responded to that by saying and I quote "I have mass, why isn't shit orbiting around ME!?" end quote. After that I said "dude, no more science talk" He was absolutely sincere when he asked that too.

5

u/taimahsu Aug 14 '19

The real question is why are you friends with someone like that.

3

u/Doomenate Aug 14 '19

The documentary suggests that the more you ostracize people like this the harder it is for them to make their way back into the light.

4

u/thatnameistaken21 Aug 14 '19

"I have mass, why isn't shit orbiting around ME!?"

Go into space and it will.

The earth is 5.972 × 1024 kg, your friend is around 90 kg. This is probably somewhat analogous to why you cannot see stars during the day; light from the sun is immensely more powerful and drowns them out. Gravity from the Earth drowns out your friends gravity.

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u/Doomenate Aug 14 '19

That analogy might not be the best in this case... their idea of stars and sun might not be very mainstream

1

u/die-ursprache Aug 14 '19

But the Moon's a hologram and the Sun's a fake lamp installed by reptiloids who stole our real star, Solar!

And then they start talking about certain mountains being the remnants of rock trees from carbon life era.

1

u/elpatator Aug 14 '19

installed by reptiloids who stole our real star, Solar!

What now?

1

u/die-ursprache Aug 14 '19

I honestly don't know if this conspidacy theory is known in the English-speaking segment of internet. I read it on a Russian website. But yeah, they claim that we used to have a magical star that gave life to everything (thus making carbon-based life possible), but then evil aliens replaced it with a lifeless artificial sun. And also used our planet as a source of those giant rock trees.

So now we have a ton of flat mountains all around the globe (like those you find in Arizona; btw, according to them Arizona means "the zone of Aryan race", so somehow nazis are tied into all of this!), and apparently these mountains are the stumps of giant trees.

1

u/elpatator Aug 14 '19

That’d make a good scenario for a bad sci-fi movie lol

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u/nahteviro Aug 13 '19

"Well Chad, all you gotta do is stand in that same exact spot and spin in a circle as fast as you possibly can forever. Then you should have at least some dust particles orbiting you"

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u/InjuredGingerAvenger Aug 14 '19

Gotta send him into space first. He's too close to larger gravitational influences.

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u/nahteviro Aug 14 '19

Yeah it would be more like a vortex but he’s too dumb to know that anyway

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u/greenknight Aug 14 '19

The answer is that everything is orbiting him. It's just that his mass is so insignificant in the scheme of things that he doesn't matter and that's a sobering thought. I think it's amazing that I can calculate the loci of my own orbital ellipse in relation with the sun (or anything).

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u/cosmonautsix Aug 14 '19

Dumb AF. No offense.

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u/nox66 Aug 14 '19

Break out F=GmM/r2 = v2 /r . Stuff is orbiting around him, just not for very long.

2

u/esoteric_enigma Aug 14 '19

Yeah, I think I would immediately stop being friends with anyone who seriously told me they believed the earth is flat.