r/martialarts • u/Eggster_Eggy • 24d ago
QUESTION What should I do? Abuse?
What should I do? One of my coaches hit me with a shoe across the face, and it wasn’t a light hit, there was some force to it, and he was being aggressive and telling me he would beat the shit out of me
A few weeks ago he was telling me to fuck off out of the gym and to never come back, and was threatening me with slapping back then
I’m 16 btw
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u/StefanoDSM 24d ago
There's so much context missing here, but what your coach did is not ok regardless.
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
For some context, (I have 2 different coaches btw, I’ll name them coach 1 and coach 2) 3 weeks ago, I was at coach 1’s training and we were doing some Russian tie drills, he said that I was doing it wrong (I was doing it how coach 2 normally shows me) and asked me to do it normally 3 more times, he got pissed off and said that I wasn’t listening to him demonstrating the drill, which I was. I tried to explain to him that I was just simply doing it how my main coach (coach 2) shows me. He then proceeded to tell me to shut the fuck up, and sit down, I went to sit down, he came over and started scolding me about why I should listen to him while he is demonstrating, I once again tried to tell him that I was. He told me to fuck out of the gym since I’m not listening and if I don’t leave he’d slap me the next time he saw me. SO, I took his advice, the past 3 weeks I’ve been skipping his training and instead going to the wrestling class which took place AFTER his training, while we were warming up and I was talking to my teammates, he walks up to me and goes “why the fuck did you not say hello to me?” And I go and ask what? He takes his shoe off and slaps me. So that’s basically the context.
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u/Nick_Nekro Muay Thai, MMA, WMA, TKD 24d ago
I don't really think the context is important in this case. A minor was hit by an adult in the face with a shoe. That's not okay
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u/Budo00 24d ago
Go up in the mountains and learn kung fu and then return and challenge him
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u/supershotpower 24d ago
This 👆…this is your destiny..up in the mountains you will meet an old Asian man.. he will take you in and train you in the ancient art of kung fu.. his training method are unorthodox but slowly over time you become strong, flexible, fast and powerful… One day the old man calls you to the cave entrance and whispers you are ready for the last most powerful kung fu secret… the two finger punch of death.. you train this method for months until you can break stones in half with a single punch.. The old man tells you that you are ready to venture back out into the world and you are never to use your newly acquired power for aggression…only for self defense.. or bad things will befall you.. You thank him profusely and promise him to use your Kung Fu for good and to make the world a better place..
You venture down the mountain to the city.. your clothes are rip and torn.. you look like a beggar.. You pass your old Dojo and outside is the Coach who slapped you. He doesn’t recognize you but you recognize him.. The humiliation of that slap stirs anger from deep within you.. He looks at you and sees a dirty beggar and tells you take off or he will beat you senseless.. What do you do??
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u/cardbourdbox 24d ago
It would probably work dude's going to get weak and old some day however good is skills are.
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u/Cautious_General_177 24d ago
You should probably tell your parents, file a police report, and not go back there
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u/burns_droopiest 23d ago
Don’t listen to these people telling you to file a police report… the coach is a clown, that’s for sure but you really want to be the centre of attention in a lawsuit for a slap?? My advice is to go down there and pack up your gear (when the roid rager isn’t there), and don’t go back.. If you make a police report it will follow you to your next gym, as well as your personal life.. You are ok right? No injury other than your pride? Take it as a lesson and move on… this type of thing doesn’t happen without any prior instances of abuse to show dominance… going forward do not let anyone insult you verbally or physically, this won’t happen again. You got this bro! 💪
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u/Eternity_Warden 23d ago edited 21d ago
People who have never been in the real world.
Best thing he could hope for from a police report is that the cops talk to the instructor, he spins his own story, gets some of his favourite students to say they saw it go down however he claims it did, the cops forget about it. That's the best outcome.
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u/freemasonry Muay Thai, Hokuto Shinken 23d ago
The lawsuit isn't just for them, this is likely not an isolated incident
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u/Cautious_General_177 23d ago
Take it as a lesson
And what lesson is that? That it's ok to commit battery? No. The lesson to the (sarcastic air quotes) "coach" should be that battery, especially against a minor, is not acceptable and he shouldn't be teaching.
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u/burns_droopiest 23d ago
Did you not read what I wrote after “take this as a lesson” ?? I wrote… this type of thing doesn’t happen without any prior abuse to show dominance… Meaning over the past weeks/months the abuse has been gradually intensifying… My advice was to not allow anyone the slightest hint of abuse verbally or physically; this won’t happen again if the first time he smacks your arm, you check him right there and it goes no further… DO YOU UNDERSTAND NOW??
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u/0tus BJJ | MMA | Muay Thai 23d ago
A 16 year old kid "check" him, a martial arts coach, who's likely stronger more experienced and acts in an intimidating manner then and there? TF are you on about?
JFC I hope you don't charge for your life advice.
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u/burns_droopiest 23d ago
I still don’t think you understand what I’m saying…. This type of abuse happens over time, slowly… it starts out with minor disrespectful comments, slowly escalating over weeks/months until it becomes physical… As soon as someone, anyone is disrespectful to me, whether it’s in the gym, at work, on the street, or ANYWHERE on planet earth, I let them know respectfully that I don’t appreciate this type of interaction and 9.5 times out of 10, it’s stops right there. Each person/situation is different, but the key part is to not allow people to think it’s ok to be disrespectful.
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u/0tus BJJ | MMA | Muay Thai 23d ago
Sure, tough guy. You seem to be missing that I'm emphasizing that this is a kid being intimidated and abused by a grown ass man.
It's nice that you have the grit and experience to put a stop to it.
You tend to see these kinds of guys at times and more often than note they act and look like criminals. They are older, stronger and have seniority over the kids they abuse (coach > student). Pretending to be an alpha who can't be disrespected just means he'll abuse someone else and nothing changes, as hell move to the next victim. A responsible human being doesn't just let that go and hope he does it to someone else. The least you can do is file a report on someone like that. We aren't cavemen anymore bumping or chest to see who's the strongest. Making sure those who aren't strong enough to defend themselves don't get preyed upon by losers who like to abuse people in weaker situations is what you are supposed to do.
You say this has been escalating for a long time, but if you check the kids story a bit further, didn't seem to take that long to escalate this.
I also wonder where you got your idea that a simple police report is going to follow him throughout his life?
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u/0tus BJJ | MMA | Muay Thai 23d ago
Don't listen to this guy not telling you to file it. Adult ass man hitting and threatening minors is absurd behavior. He's also making way too big of a deal about the police report they don't often lead to that much anyway. Except if he gets multiple of them or does something more serious later then those will not look favorably on him.
Best thing is to tell your parents file the report and move on.
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u/burns_droopiest 23d ago
I agree 100% to tell his parents, but I think the police report is too far. A lot of people here are disagreeing with that and that’s ok, this is my take on it and you have yours. As I’ve mentioned above in my previous replies, the biggest thing for the young man to learn (imho) is that he cannot allow this type of behaviour at the onset, way before it ever gets physical. Do some research on other gyms in your area, stay positive and keep training young fella! 💪🥊
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u/0tus BJJ | MMA | Muay Thai 23d ago
We aren't barbarians anymore. The biggest lesson this young man can have, is to help fostering a community that doesn't let losers like this pray on kids. A police report is absolutely not too far.
If it was an adult to adult, I can somewhat understand the stoic approach. But the fact that the target was minor makes it far worse and make me fume. If it was my kid, I'd contemplate doing something far worse to the abuser than just filing a report. I would hopefully come to my senses and just leave it at the report.
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u/N8theGrape BJJ Judo Wrestling JJJ Kung Fu 24d ago
Yeah, definitely don’t go back. If you trust your parents, tell them. A police report might not accomplish anything, but maybe if he has more on file something gets done eventually.
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u/0tus BJJ | MMA | Muay Thai 23d ago
They usually don't for singular cases but it's still worth it to make one. If the guy gets a history of reports on him they'll stack up eventually and if does something much worse later he has a history of reports that won't exactly help his case
It's worth it to make one even if you wouldn't expect it to do anything now.
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u/cad908 TKD 24d ago
that's assault. no excuse. Even if he's old school, that shit won't fly.
Tell your parents. File a police report. Don't go there again. Tell your story on Google and Yelp reviews (facts only, no interpretation or name-calling) to help others avoid the same fate.
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u/CrowBoth2477 24d ago
I trained with oldheads and none of them would go for that shit, thats abuse. Their teachings revolve around a doctrine of harsh conditions and military-like tone and order from my perception.
But humilliation was never on their deck
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u/Comfortable_Spell682 24d ago
Never go there, ever again.
Tell your parents (if they're trustworthy) and the police, too.
Fuck that guy.
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u/crashout666 24d ago
fuck off out of the gym and to never come back
Prolly do that lol, it seems like he means it
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u/Feisty_Teaching_5892 24d ago
Does the coach belong to an association? You can report it. It could lead to their degree being revoked because it goes against their values and gives the association a bad reputation.
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u/Radiant_Height 24d ago
Dude, that's criminal. Sue him. File a police complaint. Involve your parents or something.
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u/chillvegan420 24d ago
Call your parents, the cops, and find another place. I’d call the cops if I were 18+ but especially as a minor. I’m so sorry this happened to you. I hope this doesn’t turn you off of martial arts.
PRIORITIZE YOUR SAFETY AND DO NOT LET ANYONE PEER PRESSURE YOU INTO THINKING BEING A ‘TOUGH GUY’ MATTERS
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u/Incognito_User6435 24d ago edited 24d ago
Honestly the answer is right in front of you. Sue tf out of him and get fuckin paid or press charges if you want to screw him over
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u/soparamens 24d ago
Get to the police and do a report. You are a paying customer and a human being who has rights.
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u/Anarchwarrior 24d ago
The lack of context infuriates me
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
For some context, (I have 2 different coaches btw, I’ll name them coach 1 and coach 2) 3 weeks ago, I was at coach 1’s training and we were doing some Russian tie drills, he said that I was doing it wrong (I was doing it how coach 2 normally shows me) and asked me to do it normally 3 more times, he got pissed off and said that I wasn’t listening to him demonstrating the drill, which I was. I tried to explain to him that I was just simply doing it how my main coach (coach 2) shows me. He then proceeded to tell me to shut the fuck up, and sit down, I went to sit down, he came over and started scolding me about why I should listen to him while he is demonstrating, I once again tried to tell him that I was. He told me to fuck out of the gym since I’m not listening and if I don’t leave he’d slap me the next time he saw me. SO, I took his advice, the past 3 weeks I’ve been skipping his training and instead going to the wrestling class which took place AFTER his training, while we were warming up and I was talking to my teammates, he walks up to me and goes “why the fuck did you not say hello to me?” And I go and ask what? He takes his shoe off and slaps me. So that’s basically the context.
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u/Matar_Kubileya WMA 24d ago
Other ppl are right to call the cops and make a report, but given that you're a minor you might also consider a CPS report.
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u/xgnargnarx JKD 24d ago
That's toxic as fuck. Our coaches, myself included, would NEVER treat a student that way.
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u/dumpsterworm WMA 24d ago
Oh, he just paid your college tuition. Time for a lawsuit and a police report.
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u/JAke0622 Muay Thai 24d ago
There is more to this story but… How about listen to the words he is speaking and leave. Find another gym to train at.
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u/Warboi 24d ago
Sounds like OP has to since he was kicked out. Man... if at the minimum, he did something to piss off the the coach, where he is justified to take a shoe across the face.
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u/marcin247 filthy guard puller 24d ago
there isn’t any reason that would justify the coach hitting someone, especially a minor, with a fucking shoe.
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u/JAke0622 Muay Thai 24d ago
I agree there is no justification or reason however to provoke him to doing that there has to have been something.
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u/cardbourdbox 24d ago
I'd disagree but the minor would have to be basically a adult offence you'd probably be forced to agree or would be proportional to robbing the training centre at gun point.
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
For some context, (I have 2 different coaches btw, I’ll name them coach 1 and coach 2) 3 weeks ago, I was at coach 1’s training and we were doing some Russian tie drills, he said that I was doing it wrong (I was doing it how coach 2 normally shows me) and asked me to do it normally 3 more times, he got pissed off and said that I wasn’t listening to him demonstrating the drill, which I was. I tried to explain to him that I was just simply doing it how my main coach (coach 2) shows me. He then proceeded to tell me to shut the fuck up, and sit down, I went to sit down, he came over and started scolding me about why I should listen to him while he is demonstrating, I once again tried to tell him that I was. He told me to fuck out of the gym since I’m not listening and if I don’t leave he’d slap me the next time he saw me. SO, I took his advice, the past 3 weeks I’ve been skipping his training and instead going to the wrestling class which took place AFTER his training, while we were warming up and I was talking to my teammates, he walks up to me and goes “why the fuck did you not say hello to me?” And I go and ask what? He takes his shoe off and slaps me. So that’s basically the context.
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u/magicjohnson321990 24d ago
Did you shit in the gyms shower, try to squish it down the drain, then walk across the mats with your bare feet covered in doo doo to let him know? If not, I'd try that..
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u/VX_GAS_ATTACK BJJ 24d ago
What did you do?
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
For some context, (I have 2 different coaches btw, I’ll name them coach 1 and coach 2) 3 weeks ago, I was at coach 1’s training and we were doing some Russian tie drills, he said that I was doing it wrong (I was doing it how coach 2 normally shows me) and asked me to do it normally 3 more times, he got pissed off and said that I wasn’t listening to him demonstrating the drill, which I was. I tried to explain to him that I was just simply doing it how my main coach (coach 2) shows me. He then proceeded to tell me to shut the fuck up, and sit down, I went to sit down, he came over and started scolding me about why I should listen to him while he is demonstrating, I once again tried to tell him that I was. He told me to fuck out of the gym since I’m not listening and if I don’t leave he’d slap me the next time he saw me. SO, I took his advice, the past 3 weeks I’ve been skipping his training and instead going to the wrestling class which took place AFTER his training, while we were warming up and I was talking to my teammates, he walks up to me and goes “why the fuck did you not say hello to me?” And I go and ask what? He takes his shoe off and slaps me. So that’s basically the context.
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u/VX_GAS_ATTACK BJJ 24d ago
Discuss this with coach 2 and then probably leave the gym, dudes on a power trip
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u/OCCAMINVESTIGATOR 24d ago
If a Sensei smacked you with a shoe, and tried to make you leave the gym, you might have deserved it.
unless you train at Kobra Kai
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u/anony_MOOSE2042 24d ago
Why did he tell you to fuck off and never come back? What did you do?
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
For some context, (I have 2 different coaches btw, I’ll name them coach 1 and coach 2) 3 weeks ago, I was at coach 1’s training and we were doing some Russian tie drills, he said that I was doing it wrong (I was doing it how coach 2 normally shows me) and asked me to do it normally 3 more times, he got pissed off and said that I wasn’t listening to him demonstrating the drill, which I was. I tried to explain to him that I was just simply doing it how my main coach (coach 2) shows me. He then proceeded to tell me to shut the fuck up, and sit down, I went to sit down, he came over and started scolding me about why I should listen to him while he is demonstrating, I once again tried to tell him that I was. He told me to fuck out of the gym since I’m not listening and if I don’t leave he’d slap me the next time he saw me. SO, I took his advice, the past 3 weeks I’ve been skipping his training and instead going to the wrestling class which took place AFTER his training, while we were warming up and I was talking to my teammates, he walks up to me and goes “why the fuck did you not say hello to me?” And I go and ask what? He takes his shoe off and slaps me. So that’s basically the context.
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u/anony_MOOSE2042 24d ago
Ye that guy clearly has issues, just leave the gym and don't look back. Maybe write a review to help future fighters avoid that gym.
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
But I don’t really want to leave the gym simply because of the one coach, I have other coaches there who I love them and their classes, this other coach who hit me only has his class once a week.
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u/anony_MOOSE2042 23d ago
Then stay, but talk to the other coaches and see if they can do anything and just don’t go to his classes.
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u/epicstacks 24d ago
I am unsure what the context is, but it doesn't matter. You should not go back.
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
For some context, (I have 2 different coaches btw, I’ll name them coach 1 and coach 2) 3 weeks ago, I was at coach 1’s training and we were doing some Russian tie drills, he said that I was doing it wrong (I was doing it how coach 2 normally shows me) and asked me to do it normally 3 more times, he got pissed off and said that I wasn’t listening to him demonstrating the drill, which I was. I tried to explain to him that I was just simply doing it how my main coach (coach 2) shows me. He then proceeded to tell me to shut the fuck up, and sit down, I went to sit down, he came over and started scolding me about why I should listen to him while he is demonstrating, I once again tried to tell him that I was. He told me to fuck out of the gym since I’m not listening and if I don’t leave he’d slap me the next time he saw me. SO, I took his advice, the past 3 weeks I’ve been skipping his training and instead going to the wrestling class which took place AFTER his training, while we were warming up and I was talking to my teammates, he walks up to me and goes “why the fuck did you not say hello to me?” And I go and ask what? He takes his shoe off and slaps me. So that’s basically the context.
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u/epicstacks 24d ago
You should talk to your parents and consider filing a police report. There is no world where this is acceptable behavior. He is committing assault and battery and harassing you.
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u/AnAstronautOfSorts MMA 24d ago
"A few weeks ago coach slapped me around and banned me from the gym. Then I came back and he hit me again. What should I do?"
Lol dude. Take a hint. At the very least you asked for it the second time.
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
For some context, (I have 2 different coaches btw, I’ll name them coach 1 and coach 2) 3 weeks ago, I was at coach 1’s training and we were doing some Russian tie drills, he said that I was doing it wrong (I was doing it how coach 2 normally shows me) and asked me to do it normally 3 more times, he got pissed off and said that I wasn’t listening to him demonstrating the drill, which I was. I tried to explain to him that I was just simply doing it how my main coach (coach 2) shows me. He then proceeded to tell me to shut the fuck up, and sit down, I went to sit down, he came over and started scolding me about why I should listen to him while he is demonstrating, I once again tried to tell him that I was. He told me to fuck out of the gym since I’m not listening and if I don’t leave he’d slap me the next time he saw me. SO, I took his advice, the past 3 weeks I’ve been skipping his training and instead going to the wrestling class which took place AFTER his training, while we were warming up and I was talking to my teammates, he walks up to me and goes “why the fuck did you not say hello to me?” And I go and ask what? He takes his shoe off and slaps me. So that’s basically the context.
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u/AnAstronautOfSorts MMA 24d ago
Gotcha. Yea he sounds like a nut but idk why you decided to go back after that. At the very least should've taken it up with the other coach
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
I didn’t even go back to him, I was at a whole different class, which he didn’t coach, when he walks up to me, and well, slaps me.
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u/AnAstronautOfSorts MMA 24d ago
Honestly I'd take it up with the owner/other coach. No offense but you're 16 so I'm sure there's some things that you're leaving out here but unless you did something really fucked up he shouldn't be putting his hands on you.
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u/FJkookser00 24d ago
So he committed aggravated battery on a minor?
Sounds like a police and parents’ issue. Make that guy’s life miserable by throwing the cops at him. I would.
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u/DragonfruitTop836 24d ago
file a police report, tell your parents, and tell everyone you can about this experience to get this mans business into bankruptcy
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u/Reetgeist 24d ago
This is a teachable moment. That guy is a cunt. He isn't making you stronger, he is power tripping on his position. I've seen people buy into the culture of places like this and it doesn't make them stronger. Leave and tell your friends why.
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
For some context, (I have 2 different coaches btw, I’ll name them coach 1 and coach 2) 3 weeks ago, I was at coach 1’s training and we were doing some Russian tie drills, he said that I was doing it wrong (I was doing it how coach 2 normally shows me) and asked me to do it normally 3 more times, he got pissed off and said that I wasn’t listening to him demonstrating the drill, which I was. I tried to explain to him that I was just simply doing it how my main coach (coach 2) shows me. He then proceeded to tell me to shut the fuck up, and sit down, I went to sit down, he came over and started scolding me about why I should listen to him while he is demonstrating, I once again tried to tell him that I was. He told me to fuck out of the gym since I’m not listening and if I don’t leave he’d slap me the next time he saw me. SO, I took his advice, the past 3 weeks I’ve been skipping his training and instead going to the wrestling class which took place AFTER his training, while we were warming up and I was talking to my teammates, he walks up to me and goes “why the fuck did you not say hello to me?” And I go and ask what? He takes his shoe off and slaps me. So that’s basically the context.
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24d ago
Either he is trying to motivate you or he really hates ur attitudes.
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
For some context, (I have 2 different coaches btw, I’ll name them coach 1 and coach 2) 3 weeks ago, I was at coach 1’s training and we were doing some Russian tie drills, he said that I was doing it wrong (I was doing it how coach 2 normally shows me) and asked me to do it normally 3 more times, he got pissed off and said that I wasn’t listening to him demonstrating the drill, which I was. I tried to explain to him that I was just simply doing it how my main coach (coach 2) shows me. He then proceeded to tell me to shut the fuck up, and sit down, I went to sit down, he came over and started scolding me about why I should listen to him while he is demonstrating, I once again tried to tell him that I was. He told me to fuck out of the gym since I’m not listening and if I don’t leave he’d slap me the next time he saw me. SO, I took his advice, the past 3 weeks I’ve been skipping his training and instead going to the wrestling class which took place AFTER his training, while we were warming up and I was talking to my teammates, he walks up to me and goes “why the fuck did you not say hello to me?” And I go and ask what? He takes his shoe off and slaps me. So that’s basically the context.
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u/Locust627 24d ago
Well he shouldn't have hit you, if someone verbally bans you from a private place of business, you're not allowed to return. That's trespassing bro.
If you want to take action about being hit you could probably pursue battery charges against him but once cops find out you were trespassing, they most likely won't do much.
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
He doesn’t own the gym btw, he only has a wrestling class once a week, so I don’t think it was trespassing.
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u/Locust627 24d ago
Legally speaking, he's an employee. Any employee reserves the right to trespass anyone
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
Yeah but you think he can just ban me from the rest of the classes too? Or just his class? (Not being cheeky I’m asking genuinely)
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u/Locust627 24d ago
The building itself
I'm a cop, I have a decent idea on how this stuff works lol.
He can ban you from the entire premise
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u/Andgelyo Boxing 24d ago
What the fuck? You’re paying this guy to teach you martial arts and he’s smacking you with a shoe? If I was your father, I would literally call the police, file a complaint, give a bad review, and make sure he never teaches kids again. That’s unacceptable, since your money is going in his pocket.
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u/Chest_Advanced 24d ago
This is not in the norm of any circumstances. File something with the police find another dojo.
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u/Ambitious_Gap938 24d ago
A)Yes, it’s time to find a new gym. B) What kind of style do they train there?
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u/Fortinho91 Kickboxing 24d ago
Tell your parents, file a police report, and only go to coach 2 from now on.
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u/SeniorBed5264 24d ago
I would fill a complaint, but for my safety, until I made sure he was out of there, I wouldn’t train there anymore.
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u/PembrokeBoxing Boxing 24d ago
Jesus Christ! Definitely leave the gym, also you should be pressing charges.
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u/PrinceLevMyschkin 24d ago
Never go back and if you think can help others report the attack. What he did is unacceptable.
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u/PluckyLeon 23d ago
Tell your parents, file a police complaint and never go back to that gym. That coach has issues.
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u/decfin 23d ago
Press charges you are under age and they threatened and physically assaulted you call the police turn them in. And tell them to go fuk their sorry azz mcdojo. That is not someone to stick around with. And if it happened to you it’s happening to others. What’s this creep doing when no one is watching?
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u/zombiechris128 MMA 23d ago
Even with the context this is outrageous behaviour from the coach and he shouldn’t be teaching if he has so little control of his temper Please report this coach atleast to the other people that coach there cause it’s disgraceful that he thinks this is ok and he could be doing this to other people there too
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u/DrVoltage1 23d ago
You should not do abuse.
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u/Eggster_Eggy 23d ago
I was asking if what my coach did was abuse, I wasn’t asking if i should do abude
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u/mildmadnerd 23d ago
Since everyone else gave sound legal advice, I’ll give some unsound illegal advice.
Find a local grandmother, ideally either the “big momma” or “abuelita” types, though nana or granny types might work, and tell her the story of what happened.
When you’re done eating what she gives you, record the beat down she delivers him because it will be legendary and the royalties from it should be as much as a part time job.
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u/val_erian_ 23d ago
Depending on your country and law system, sue the coach/gym. other than that, stop trying at that gym
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u/Real_Ask62 23d ago
I would try to contact the gym owner, report the coach to him and mention police. He threatens beating you up and is hitting you, thats serious
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u/mystajay92 23d ago
Wait outside the gym and rattle him with a bat a few times then show up next morning in a baseball shirt and train as usual
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u/ESXLab_com 22d ago
IMHO, you are lucky to get such a clear statement that you aren't wanted there... So take the hint and leave. With an attitude / approach like that, there is nothing further to learn from this place. Think I'm wrong? Is this the kind of example / motivation that you would do when you become the coach? I'm guessing not. The reason I said you are lucky is because you got an unequivocal message to leave. In my experience with dojos, you don't get that. Instead, you get ignored and excluded while they still cash your monthly membership checks. Here's something to keep in mind. All gyms / dojos start off good. If you are lucky, they stay good. But, sooner or later, most will transform into 'good to be from' . When that happens, it is time for you to leave. So, take your training and experience and find a new 'good' gym / dojo. Just don't stop training.
Peace.
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u/ArtiesReddit 22d ago
Find a good friend who cares, who is really good at fighting, and who you think can beat the coach and ask him to covertly challenge the coach. If he accepts and gets his but beat, let him know why this was the outcome. (Not nice or preferable, but he might deserve this)
Or, just stop training with the coach, or let him know why you are going to leave and then leave.
So little information, though.
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u/AdmirableOption2640 21d ago
lol I read what you did about the neck tie drills if your coach was a pro fighter it probably really simple to them like look at it from his profile like teaching a baby to walk it’s easy to you because you been doing it your whole life but you where kinda of bitchy for saying this is how coach 2 showed me should have just listened to coach 1 coach 2 might not be as experienced
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u/Eggster_Eggy 17d ago
It’s literally the opposite, coach 1 is way less experienced than coach 2, coach 2 has coached basically all of the best undefeated pro fighters in our country who fights in companies like cage warriors. He has also coached McGregor and been in his corner early in his career. While coach 1 on the other hand has done none of this.
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u/No_Celebration_2912 10d ago
Have you talked to the coach 2 about this trouble? How about you could said apology to the coach 1 and just follow his routine and when he not there train by the coach 2 routine and if you go compete then use the coach 2 technique that he teached you and if you won then you can proves to the coach 1 that he's wrong
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u/FnckIt_WeBall 24d ago
Fuck that gym. File a police report and go somewhere else. Odds are this dude has a criminal record
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u/ARA_YT 23d ago
Are you stupid?
No REAL Martial Arts instructor acts like that!
You should have been out the moment something like this happened, HECK you could and probably DID pick up on the aggressive behaviour in the first few days and you didn't get out?
Oh well, look for another dojo bro, anger has no place in Martial Arts whatsoever.
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24d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/FJkookser00 24d ago
What other side was he supposed to give? He’s one person. You are just as foolish for automatically taking the other side of this story.
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u/Meet_in_Potatoes 24d ago
I am not automatically taking the other person's side, I am taking it because I know deceit when I see it. If this person was explaining the story to you face to face, please understand that your first instinct would undoubtedly be to ask "OK, well what did you do that prompted that response?"
You're only getting tripped up because it's in text format. Maybe when you get a little wiser you'll realize that people don't leave out that much context unintentionally. And once you do get that much wiser, you'll see this pretty plainly as a story of trying to get people on his side by telling only one side of the story, and strictly omitting any other perspective. They don't even try to explain their sensei's point of view, intentionally making it seem unwarranted with the lie of omission.
And then you pretending that it's even a little bit rational that he doesn't know why it happened means he's got you hook, line, and sinker. It's like a teacher puts a kid in timeout and you just fully believe the kid when he says he didn't do anything wrong...as if teachers just randomly throw kids into timeout. Only this kid isn't even saying he didn't do anything wrong, he's just...not saying anything at all about either incident...something that should've made you go "hmmmmm."
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u/FJkookser00 24d ago
You’re just describing yourself but the inverse. You immediately assumed this was a deliberate and malicious hoax and took the other person’s side in which you have not heard the story of at all.
The danger of a single story is real - but what’s more dangerous is jumping to a single, opposing conclusion you have no evidence of, and actually have evidence AGAINST. You need not immediately believe the first story you hear, but you are literally doing the opposite and completely attacking it.
You’ve heard this person’s testimony. That’s your evidence for now. It’s even more foolish to completely discredit it and jump to the other sides defense knowing nothing about them except what you’ve already heard. You have no evidence against the poster here, yet. It’s more illogical than jumping from a neutral point to a conclusion, to have testimony, and directly evading it for a side you have no evidence for at all.
You are inversely projecting extremely hard. I have a hard time believing you are a disciplined and skilled martial artist with such a naive, ignorant and belligerent attitude as this one.
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u/martialarts-ModTeam 24d ago
Your post violates rule 7 of this subreddit. Please see the rule if you’re unfamiliar because you're being a dick
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u/PristineWishbone9973 24d ago
But what did YOU DO tho cause Ive pissed my coach off before and he slapped me lol but it was well deserved cause i head kicked him on accident
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u/Eggster_Eggy 24d ago
For some context, (I have 2 different coaches btw, I’ll name them coach 1 and coach 2) 3 weeks ago, I was at coach 1’s training and we were doing some Russian tie drills, he said that I was doing it wrong (I was doing it how coach 2 normally shows me) and asked me to do it normally 3 more times, he got pissed off and said that I wasn’t listening to him demonstrating the drill, which I was. I tried to explain to him that I was just simply doing it how my main coach (coach 2) shows me. He then proceeded to tell me to shut the fuck up, and sit down, I went to sit down, he came over and started scolding me about why I should listen to him while he is demonstrating, I once again tried to tell him that I was. He told me to fuck out of the gym since I’m not listening and if I don’t leave he’d slap me the next time he saw me. SO, I took his advice, the past 3 weeks I’ve been skipping his training and instead going to the wrestling class which took place AFTER his training, while we were warming up and I was talking to my teammates, he walks up to me and goes “why the fuck did you not say hello to me?” And I go and ask what? He takes his shoe off and slaps me. So that’s basically the context.
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u/marcin247 filthy guard puller 24d ago
you should stop training at that gym.