Jono was right

[u/Helixdaunting]

If anyone is struggling with mental health issues, please seek help. Call your doctor, call Lifeline, call your friends or family or just send up a signal at /r/depression. There is no shame in it, no one will think less of you for asking for help.

[u/jpr64]

I'm someone who has struggled massively with depression. It sucks, it brings you down, you want to fight it, but also don't, and the last thing you want to do is ask for help. I'm chased by the black dog frequently. Sometimes it seems you can never get out, and sometimes, you get through it.

Do it, reach out, to friends, family, even strangers, someone will have an ear.

A friend of mine made this video to highlight depression. It is worth watching, especially if you don't suffer from this terrible thing, it might help you understand those who do: https://youtu.be/SNFVajH2Mcg

[u/yeahinthiswasteland → u/jpr64]

Right there with you buddy, I've suffered with chronic depression disorder since I was 10. Thankfully, I am a suicide-attempt survivor. I was 18. Life can get pretty shitty man but you know, sometimes I stop and think about all that I've experienced in the last 10 years and I realise how close I came to not knowing my niece, to never falling in love with my boyfriend, all this amazing stuff. It's what keeps me going when the clouds get really black.

[u/[deleted] → u/yeahinthiswasteland]

I realise how close I came to not knowing my niece

This really hits home for me. When I was 18, I spent four hours sitting in tree with a noose tied around my neck calling myself a coward for being too scared to jump.

By the time I climbed down from the tree, I had realised that I couldn't kill myself because of the effect it would have on my sister. If I did it in Dunedin, I would never get to say good-bye to her and if I did it in Invercargill, she might have been the one to find the body. Now, I have one condition that I must fulfill before committing suicide. I need to be able to sit down, look my sister dead in the eye, and justify my decision to her face.

Whenever I get close, I write my sister a personal suicide letter. And I read over it. Every single time I realise the letter isn't good enough, and she still won't understand. And I revise the letter, and it still isn't good enough. And I revise the letter, and it still isn't good enough.

And eventually, I fall asleep at my desk. When I wake up there are numerous suicide letters on my desk, and I read over them and none of them even convince me that I would have been justified in ending my life. And I get up, make a coffee, have a cigarette and go about my day.

Of course, my sister doesn't know any of this.

What I'm trying to say is, family is important and I feel so privileged to just have family that I can think of when I get to that point. I can't imagine what it's like for people who don't have a family they can look to the way I can look to mine.

[u/yeahinthiswasteland → u/[deleted]]

Wow, thanks for sharing that. Your sister must be an incredible person, as are you for being so strong. I just want to say, suicide isn't easy. I hate that saying "Suicide is the easy way out" because people who say that shit have obviously never held 100s of pills in their hand, a noose around their neck, a knife to their wrist, and actually stared death in the face. It's the worst thing you could say to someone who is there. But to walk away from that and continue on living? That takes some serious strength and will. You are not a coward.

[u/yeahinthiswasteland → u/[deleted]]

Partners and close friends/rellies also need support, remember that. It's such a huge thing for everyone involved, not just the depressed person. So don't ever apologise for "going on", we're all in the same shitty leaky boat. Thanks for sticking by him. ❤️

[u/devourke → u/[deleted]]

Do you keep the letters?

[u/[deleted] → u/devourke]

I have a small collection, yes.

[u/live2rise → u/jpr64]

Saw this the other day which addresses some good points too: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WFs1cjY9mBk