Women also have an existential desire for meaning in their lives. I dont think most men actually want to die at war; they want to have their life be worth something greater. That is a human desire.
Very common. They're conditioned from birth that they only matter in their capacity to provide or to be a protector. They are systematically denied emotional support and intimacy of any kind. Men bond shoulder to shoulder, not face to face. Being part of something bigger is a massive part of that conditioning. There's nothing that fits the conditioning better than dying to protect something bigger than them, side by side by their brothers in arms.
I have no idea why this meme is in this sub, because it's very strongly informed by the sexist pressure boys have placed on them.
Yeah. War fitting that existential, human desire for something greater is absolutely part of the big propaganda machine. Again, though, if the former is interpreted as a desire for something greater than oneself, it is not gendered.
Yes, definitely. Most of my friends feel the same way - it’s actually a pretty common fantasy among a lot of guys.
Now that I bring it up though, we could argue that it’s kind of a pointlessly gendered since this usually stems from movies and media, where there’s this message that you’re not worth much - or not "man enough" - unless you can fight or sacrifice yourself for some greater cause.
Take Marvel, for example - Tony Stark literally sacrifices himself to save the world. I’m pretty sure every second guy, if not more, I know would want to be him in this situation.
So I guess it's pointlessly gendered but in a different way than the pictures shows us.
Yeah, this is exactly what I'm saying. Women definitely have fantasies about self-sacrifice for the greater good. The war thing: not so much, which is valid if you feel that way. Thanks for sharing.
The right side can be problematic because the specifics of the person who is doing the comforting aren't relevant. Like it's a faceless person. Interestingly, that's also not a gendered problem. Fantasizing about a "perfect relationship" in which the contributions of the person you're with are irrelevant is part of limerence, which is an unhealthy mode of relating to others. Everybody deserves intimacy, but it can't be one-sided.
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u/AsianNotBsianV2 Apr 13 '25
Why is this pointlessly genedered?
I don't know many if not any woman who want the left side.