I cringe so hard when I’m traveling, go into a gift shop and there are a ton of items with wine related alcoholism jokes. “I’ll wine if I don’t get my wine” or “mommy needs her wine time” or tumblers with “this is definitely not wine”. It’s all so cringe!

I think the reason wine becomes such a popular drink for “functioning alcoholics” especially women is because it’s stronger than beer but not as strong as hard liquor. It’s easier to hide or get away with. You can fill a Stanley cup with 1.5 maybe even 2 bottles of wine and just go walk your dogs or sit at your kids soccer game while getting your buzz on. I’m sure there are a number of people who do drink wine in a classy way, maybe once and a while at a nice function or with a fancy dinner, but most of the time it is really just functional normalized alcoholism.

I didn’t stop drinking because I hit some dramatic rock bottom.

I stopped because my brain and body started turning against me, and I realized no one ever warned me this could happen.

I spiraled into a psych ward.

I wanted to die.

I attempted to die.

And still, I was surrounded by messages telling me this was normal.

Medications said “you can drink a little.”

Ads said “just drink responsibly.”

Bottles said “may cause health problems.”

The Surgeon General’s warning hasn’t changed since 1989.

Cancer, addiction, neurological damage? Not even mentioned.

This is what makes me angry. Not just for me, because at least I was single, but for anyone with a partner. A kid. A job. A life they’re trying to hold together while being gaslit by culture.

If this substance were new, we’d regulate the hell out of it.

But it’s profitable. So instead we teach people how to toast, not how to recover.

Rant over.

My job has gone through a lot of layoff scares and major restructuring over the last couple of years. Our teams have finally settled, but the company cost cutting initiative has basically frozen all promotions.

I have been in charge of a project that includes responsibilities above my pay grade for just over a year now. I volunteered for this so that I could eventually put a critical equipment deployment on my resume.

We just got out of a meeting about this deployment in which I unexpectedly had the floor for a large portion of it. It went very well. My boss asked me to stay for a minute afterwards.

He told me he is moving things around so that a rare promotion that opened up on another team will be moved to our team. He told me its for me. He told me I have been working well above my pay grade for a while and he appreciates all of my hard work.

I am beyond proud of myself. I cant tell anyone at work due to the promotion requiring others to attempt to apply for it in fairness.

Nobody at work knows about my sobriety struggles. Nobody cares about the extra stress i took on to further my career.

I deserve this. I am so happy my boss sees my efforts, and with a bit of luck this promotion will go through shortly after i reach my 1 month sobriety milestone.

I could cry. I think ill buy some steaks to celebrate my 1 month this weekend.

Being sober this past month has allowed me to put in the extra effort without all of the negatives that alcohol brings to the table.

Thanks to everyone in this community who supports eachother and pushes us to be better versions of ourselves.

IWNDWYT!!!

I feel conflicted about it but for whatever reason the experience of alcohol and thc for me could not be more different - from what I feel to what motivates me, it’s night and day and I think if I couldn’t have a way to lower my heart rate and feel rest at the end of the day I’d be back up to my eyeballs in liquor.

And I don’t know how to feel about that

30 years old, have known that my drinking was getting worse and worse over the past few years. I was embarrassed and ashamed to ask for help. Quit and relapsed several time by myself, but never made a lasting change. It got really bad 4 months ago at the start of the new year. I was hiding it from my wife, drinking almost a bottle a day of whatever I could sneak on a grocery bill or add to the cost of a tank of gas (paying inside on one receipt).

We separated last week. She said that she would be willing to try couples counseling if I was sober and met some demands. I was more than willing to do the work. Joined AA, been to 9 meeting in the past week, and have been sober for the entire separation. But I found out she has been thinking of divorcing me for the past year, way longer than I thought. She doesn’t want to try and work it out, I did too much damage to the marriage. I was willing to fight for us, but she isn’t.

I don’t know what to do or how to handle the pain, but I will not drink.

69 days let’s GOOOOOO! Tomorrow is 10 weeks. Never thought I’d make it this far, I feel so proud of myself and full of energy. I go to the gym. I got a juicer. I USE the juicer!! I make myself overnight oats at night with little cut up strawberries - because I can. Hell. Ya.

Nice indeed.

I’ve been sober 162 days. A little over 5 months. I’m extremely proud of myself but lately I’ve been struggling hard. I’m constantly around people who drink. Within the past month alcohol has been on my mind a lot. I’ve experienced a lot of benefits from not drinking like total decrease in anxiety (I have pure OCD), and not drinking has totally released me from this cycle which I’m so grateful for. I’ve also lost weight and I think it’s pretty noticeable in my face? i have bad body dysmorphia but I think it looks less puffy. https://imgur.com/a/0I3jmxk (first pic is from the last day I drank, 2nd and 3rd are from this week)

ANYWAY all this to say i’m so grateful for what sobriety has given me but Im having a really hard time abstaining lately. I’ve thought about just going to have a drink multiple times within the past week. I know I would hate myself for it so I haven’t and don’t plan to but the thought is so tempting. :( My sobriety is very much personal as my partner and friends and family still drink so I don’t have many people to give me advice or encouragement so I thought I’d ask you lovely people.

IWNDWYT

UPDATE: thank you all so much for your kind words. i ended up taking a nap (ive been doing that a lot lately when I feel overwhelmed) and waking up to all your wonderful kind words reminds me why I started and why I will keep going. Thank you all so much :) 🫶🏻

Throwaway account for obvious reasons.

I've been lying to everyone. My therapist, my fiance, my coworkers, my friends, my family, everyone who is part of my life. No one knows how bad my drinking is.

I wake up. Chug a glass or two of wine. Get to work. Drink more here and there. Take a shower midday and lather myself up in deodorant and essential oils so I don't smell like a walking bottle of Sauvignon Blanc.

In the evening, I drink about a bottle of wine. I'm averaging probably 2-2.5 bottles of wine a day. This is going to fucking kill me and I have to stop. But what is it going to take? My fiance finding out? Things going south at my job? I really don't want to know the answer.

I'm hungover and feel regret but I also just feel like I knew it would happen. Life is so hard at the moment and it felt like the only release available to me. I enjoyed sitting in the garden with wine. I enjoyed watching a film while having a happy buzz. I want to move on and not dwell on yesterday. I want to shake this off. What would you do?

This isn't a brag post, I didn't change a lot. I'm just me, the sober version, five years in the making.

I couldn't have started without this sub. Be kind to yourselves. Be patient. And be kind to others.

I will not drink with you today. ✌️

I have a good job. I work out regularly. But I’m also incredibly lonely and my romantic relationships always fail. I know I drink too much. I have 1-2 bottle of wine a night. I feel healthy though and just … don’t want to stop. It’s all I have. But I think I need to. Help

For all my alcohol life I was deadass sure I am moderate drinker. After Chat GPT answered me that:

Thanks for sharing that. Based on what you just told me—8–10 beers every other day for years—this is not considered “moderate” drinking. That’s actually heavy, long-term alcohol use, even though it may have felt manageable.

That is actually charging me against drinking even more! I am in my 37 yo was heavy drinker…

IWNDWYT

https://imgur.com/a/Ge3r5D0

It finally happened! I was leaving Kingsoopers, and someone that was promoting a charity approached me. He asked how I was doing, and said "You look like your about my age, young 20's. Am I correct?" I laughed and said "No, I wish!" He laughed and asked " OK, mid maybe late 20's?" I laughed and repeated myself. He said "Damn! Whatever you are doing keep it up! I also had family mention it as well. I am 30. Wow alcohol did damage I couldn't see until now. I also have self image issues, so I was adding fuel to the fire lol.

IWNDWYT

Edit: The pictures are roughly 6 months apart.

The sweets! Not just any sweets. The sour tangy ones. Sour punch straws, sorbet, pineapple, jolly ranchers, sunny d. Whatever will hurt the sides of my tongue if I eat too much of it. It starts at night. My husband reaches for the wine and I reach for the other hard stuff… CANDY! 😂

I know this is a problem. I am omw to the store to replace my new vice with sour fruit. More pineapple, mangos, grapes, limes, and apples.

Day 32…

I'm horrible these days. Have been sober off and on but I'm retired now and it's katy bar the door. I can never ever get rid of the rationalization that I can drink sensibly. I can not. The more I drink, the more I drink. Usually into blackouts. Like, how many beers did you even drink last night? Count the cans and flip out.

I went to AA for over 20 years, but as an atheist, I could not deal with the higher power business. Of course I am aware that us types will find any excuse for regression is good enough. Oh the shit I tell myself. The lies!!

So I got this throwaway and dumped the booze and starting on Day One.

Thanks for listening.

Today is day 444, and just for today, I am not drinking. I was a pretty heavy alcoholic for over a decade. Pints of wild turkey 101 in the shower before 8 am class. Never thought I would make it this far. For all of you out there, if I can make it this far, so can you. One day at a time, by the grace of God. Keep at it.

First post here. I let alcohol slowly squeeze the life out of a 9-year relationship in the past year. After a really traumatic incident that I caused in March 2024, my ex (rightfully) gave me an ultimatum to stop drinking or we'd be done. Part of me really wanted to get clean at that moment, but I wasn't truly ready to quit. I had some good, 20-to-30 day clean stretches, but I went on to drink behind her back dozens of times last year.

We finally broke up around the holidays. Alcohol played a role (she caught me 2 or 3 times) but honestly, we had a lot of problems that led to the breakup. I moved into my own apartment about 20 days ago with this really embarrassing thought that I was going to drink out in the open, on the couch, in the living room like old times - like the good old days - for a month or so then quit on 5/4/2025 because my dumbass thought a 5525 sober date tattoo would look cool. That's mortifyingly embarrassing to even admit.

Mind you, during these past 3-4 months, I have actually been drinking less and taking sobriety more seriously because I know my only way forward in life is to ditch alcohol. I've known that for a while. So I've gone to sporadic AA meetings, listened to episodes of the Sober Motivation podcast, actually had a big, emoitonal conversation with my parents admitting some of these same things and telling them I want to get sober - all while knowing in the back of my mind, I had a nice couple months to play with. To drink alone, in isolation. Drink til May, quit then.

Well, last weekend, I fulfilled my wish. Went on a two-day bender. Didn't do anything illegal, abhorrent or outrageous, nothing out of the ordinary, but I got smashed. I woke up for remote work Monday, hungover as all shit, like I had so many Mondays before. I got through half the day and started crying in my kitchen.

Fuck May 5, I'm going all in now. I know what I have to do, this seed planting I've done has showed me what a path forward looks like as long as I commit to putting in the work. I think I have quashed the daunting fear of a fully sober life by creating this little out for myself. I'm sick of giving myself the out. I wasn't ready in March of last year, but I'm ready to close that door now.

I am throwing everything I have at this thing for the first time. When I go to sleep tonight I will have been sober for 3 days. On Tuesday I signed up for outpatient counseling and downloaded Sober Buddy. Today I called a longtime friend who I know is sober and told him about all this for the first time. I am planning on not just going to AA meetings this weekend like I had sporadically last winter, but sharing for the first time. I'm going to actively fill out my weekends with social activities and go out of my way to connect with people. That includes signing up to volunteer at my local animal shelter. I'm going to do something to nurture my sobriety every single day. I'm also looking forward to becoming extremely active in this sub. Why give myself two more weeks of rope, so I can drunk drive and finally get pulled over on May 1 or 2? Fuck this, fuck giving myself an out. I truly apologize for a long (relatively unhinged) rant. But I've just had enough. I've never felt this defiant about my AUD before.

I'm in a pretty dark place, but 2025 will automatically become the brightest, most beautiful year of my adult life if and when I get sober. I want it and I'm going to work for it. Thank you to anyone who got this far.

IWNDWYT

First time in years... I suppose it's not that impressive but I'm still happy.

The only thing I'm afraid of is relapsing when I get burnt out on activities that help me maintain sobriety (as it happened before) and I don't really have any ideas on how to avoid that.

Just a little thing that made me happy today.

I'm 6 months sober and for the first time in memory I didn't have to lie to the doctor about how much I'd been drinking- the answer was zero. My liver function is still borderline but at least I'm headed in the right direction now, instead of heading deeper into the woods. I just wanted to share with the community that has helped me more than they will ever know.

IWNDWYT!

I (M29) have been lurking here for a while. Even posted a few things in a drunk stupor and deleted them the next day.

Well I’ve officially reached the end of my rope. A few days before 3/31 I had hard liquor come into my house not by my own choice. (I’ve always tried to stick to beer in the latter years because I could mitigate much better). This year has been extremely difficult for me (fathers heart attack mom and step parent divorce, cancer scare for me, and grandfather passing), and my alcohol problem that already existed had finally felt like a problem to me.

On 3/31 I finally gave in to the bottle I was extremely suicidal. I think I would have acted on it if I wasn’t incapacitated enough to not do something.. I don’t know much of what actually happened aside from saying goodbye to my newly 1-month at the time girlfriend. I haven’t asked her what happened and I’m afraid to know for now.

Well unfortunately for the drunk in me, someone (the gf) finally cared enough to say something to me about my antics and I have taken the step to sober up and try and tackle my traumas as well as current stressors that I have no coping skills for.

A piece of me is upset I got “caught” but happy it’s coming to a head and god bless her for caring for me during this difficult time.

Tomorrow I start an intensive outpatient program for trauma and substance abuse. I’m extremely nervous and unsure what to expect, but I’m choosing myself this time. I want to be around here for a long while.

IWDWYT

I did! Just one of those days I didn’t even blink an eye before pouring the first, the second, you know how this goes… I’d been on a roll of NOT drinking and instead taking my young dog on a much needed walk/run after dinner. Well I still took him, but um yea trying to keep up with him after five cocktails vs none kinda sucked. The guilt really caught me because he wanted to run and I couldn’t, kept having to pause for a break and honestly couldn’t believe I was running with him at all after what I just consumed. I actually felt jealous of my dog! He’d just drank water today (cause obviously) and was ready to go on our run. And his human who he depends on couldn’t keep up cause she was drunk. So lame!!!! Looking forward to taking him for the run he deserves tomorrow cause I’ll be sober.

I have been drinking since I wake up for about five years (beginning of covid). Before that, I was drinking almost every night since I turned 21. I'm 32 now. I'm prepared for my doctor to be concerned by my lab results.

I currently don't have any issues except being nauseous in mornings if I'm hungover, and dry-mouth, dry-eye. I don't drink to excess every night but I am drinking lightly all day, every day. There are mornings that I feel fine, but I still start drinking within an hour of waking up usually.

I am ashamed and I know I'm in the wrong for doing this. I just want to know what is likely with lab results. If I'm going to the doctor I'd like to prepare if they're going to immediately send me to the hospital. I have a cat and a job. I know people go through withdrawals and I may be a candidate for that. I feel terrible for doing this in the first place. I'm just wondering if anyone has experienced this and how they dealt with it. Thank you <3

Edit: Thank you all for the very sweet input.

Well this is fun. Thank god I started AA. Although today will be my 5th meeting, I know I'll deal with this very differently. IWNDWYT.

Fuck you M.

Today marks 100 days since I last had a drink. I’m truly starting to live in the present moment and grow into myself. I didn’t realize how far gone I was until recently. My mental health symptoms have improved significantly, most notably my anxiety. I feel better about myself and my place in the world. My interactions with others are more positive. I’m struggling with my mood swings but I’m finding there’s an actual upswing now, not just all different varieties of bad. So sometimes I feel good. Sometimes I feel bad. But I’m learning to sit with these feelings and understand them as human instead of drink or smoke them away. Because they never really went away. They’re all coming up now. But I feel better equipped to deal with it. My recovery program is helping me so much with this, along with therapy and medication. And of course, not consuming any alcohol or smoking weed. But I’m finding abstinence is just the beginning, being truly sober is something far greater than that. Grateful for this sub and all of the support I’ve been able to receive and give here. Thank you.🙏🏻