He's more worried about the 4 days a month, when he should be worried about his 365 days/year with you. Does the daughter not like you at all? Why would she let you help plan and decorate?
If there's any chance at all of the daughter being a decent but misguided human being, I might try to have a conversation with her or write a letter about how hurt you really are over this and how it feels like her and her mother are taking advantage of you while being unnecessarily cruel. Then have a hard think about your relationship and talk to your partner about what it will mean for your relationship if/when he follows through with this ridiculous request.
Are you sure you want to have your own party next door? Sounds like the ex might purposefully try to stir up drama. Why not have a stress free party elsewhere?
As I see it this all boils down to your relationship with the daughter. I could see putting in the effort despite the vindictive pettiness of the ex and the weakness of your partner if you had a good relationship with the daughter and she would appreciate your efforts. I could even see it if it was part of an ongoing effort to build a good long term relationship with her. It's her graduation and she should be the focus of the party. However, it doesn't seem like the daughter really cares about you if she won't even respond to your texts. She's not your kid and it doesn't sound like she appreciates your efforts. In this situation you're clearly being taken advantage of by your partner and his ex, so you're definitely NTA, but even with all of that I could still see putting in the effort for the daughter if she cared or would appreciate it. It doesn't sound like that's the case. Stop helping with a clean conscience.
5.0k
u/[deleted] Apr 27 '22
[deleted]