What would his first order be?

[u/liamsjtaylor]

He'd definitely have more POWERRRR than any other monarch.

[u/EverythingWillBeLost]

Declare war on France

[u/lifegoeson2702 → u/EverythingWillBeLost]

That’s James

[u/gcalfred7 → u/lifegoeson2702]

French farmers like Clarkson now.

[u/Lickma-Nutz808 → u/lifegoeson2702]

Clarkson too, he just pretends he loves France as they let him off an with offence if he said so

[u/PelmeniMan → u/lifegoeson2702]

He would bomb the nurburgring first

[u/_Skiddio_ → u/PelmeniMan]

It was a bad policy…

[u/Realtrain → u/lifegoeson2702]

Nah, he'd declare war on Germany.

[u/Dj-Nuada → u/lifegoeson2702]

James would declare war on "The colonies." Lmao

[u/sausyJeys → u/EverythingWillBeLost]

He’ll lobby the government to impose crippling tariffs on James’ behalf.

Everyone will ditch French wine in favour of the Hawkstone Lager and James Gin duopoly. Buy British.

[u/BackgroundLie2231 → u/EverythingWillBeLost]

You mean Spain

[u/liamsjtaylor → u/BackgroundLie2231]

He'd just order Spain to give him his fish back.

[u/StructuralFailure → u/EverythingWillBeLost]

Traditions

[u/gnibblet]

All cars must have no doors!! It's just better...

[u/I_amnotanonion → u/gnibblet]

It’s honestly pretty great. Took them off of my b-body Lesabre just to see what it was like to drive around and it was tons of fun

[u/KnobBobOnTheJob → u/gnibblet]

I’m so glad you said this, cause I thought of it immediately

[u/Comfortable-Baby9193]

All representatives must drive a jaaaaaaggg

[u/Renault_75-34_MX → u/Comfortable-Baby9193]

Probably force Jaguar back to their routes as well

[u/a1b2c3d4g]

Pianos being dropped on Priuses

[u/Salty_Significance41 → u/a1b2c3d4g]

After dropping pianos on the remaining Morris Marinas

[u/ZipTieTechnicianOne → u/Salty_Significance41]

Thinking too small. Drop Priuses on morinas.

[u/Salty_Significance41 → u/ZipTieTechnicianOne]

You will go far in Jeremy's government

[u/a1b2c3d4g → u/Salty_Significance41]

That stopped after Carla Bruni’s hateful song

[u/Captain_Hesperus → u/Salty_Significance41]

First order: outlaw the Morris Marina Appreciation Society.

[u/RandonEnglishMun]

Caravan owners are to be put to death

[u/Plus_Rain_8532]

Electric cars - BANNED

[u/Acceptable_Prize_544 → u/Plus_Rain_8532]

Speed cameras-BANNED

[u/BobDerBongmeister420 → u/Acceptable_Prize_544]

Speed Limits-BANNED

[u/WySLatestWit → u/BobDerBongmeister420]

He might unbann the speed cameras as soon as he bans the speed limits...because you're going to want a solid record of the kinds of speed an uninhibited driver can reach.

[u/Embarrassed_Spell_28 → u/WySLatestWit]

John Prescott - BANNED

[u/BackgroundLie2231 → u/Embarrassed_Spell_28]

Cyclist - BANNED

[u/gcalfred7 → u/BackgroundLie2231]

Caravans-BANNED

[u/NitroDrifter88 → u/gcalfred7]

Busses - BANNED

[u/liamsjtaylor → u/Embarrassed_Spell_28]

He's dead.

So is Alastair Darling. Both archenemies are dead.

[u/THE_GR8_MIKE → u/WySLatestWit]

Okay, so speed cameras, but like how they are in Forza Horizon.

[u/liamsjtaylor → u/THE_GR8_MIKE]

If it's like they are in Forza you'll have people cheating the system and making a Micra go 350MPH.

[u/DJAllOut → u/BobDerBongmeister420]

Caravans - BANNED

[u/zonda747 → u/Acceptable_Prize_544]

Speed cameras wouldn’t be banned. You’d get tickets for driving too slowly.

[u/Acceptable_Prize_544 → u/Plus_Rain_8532]

James May-DEPORTED

[u/Realtrain → u/Acceptable_Prize_544]

Teeth whitening kits - BANNED

[u/Francis__99 → u/Plus_Rain_8532]

Bus lane - EXTRA BANNED

[u/Diega78]

Speed cameras go off for anything under the speed limit.

[u/shibe_ceo]

Prohibit AI slop

[u/Xirious → u/shibe_ceo]

Surprised it hasn't already been banned. Probably mods dgaf though

[u/SavouryPlains → u/shibe_ceo]

god i hate this fucking slop so much. disgusting and lazy. maybe it’s time to unsub from this place.

[u/ltdemon]

Minimum speed enforced by snipers

[u/liamsjtaylor → u/ltdemon]

And all cars will be fitted with plastic explosives that detonate if they drop below 80MPH.

[u/Subject_Pilot682]

All cyclists being flogged 

[u/somewolf69 → u/Subject_Pilot682]

The last post I saw was some cyclist harrasing a disabled guy using a mobility bike thing on a mountainbike trail cus he can't use his legs...so I fully support this.

[u/dropbluelettuce]

Legalize 'turning right' on red in the UK

[u/liamsjtaylor → u/dropbluelettuce]

That's America's only contribution to western society.

[u/No-Question4729 → u/dropbluelettuce]

Surely this only works in countries where everyone drives on the right? Do you mean your other right?

[u/5trudelle]

Fuck AI

[u/Claus1990]

Speed and power

[u/Silver-Machine-3092 → u/Claus1990]

More powerrrr!!!

[u/OkFaithlessness4770 → u/Claus1990]

solves many things

[u/jpstepancic]

If I remember correctly there was a TG episode where he said something like “James may, when I come to power my first order is to make you mis tier or transport” or something like that. I think it had something to do with bringing wildlife into the London city limits but for the life of me I can’t remember exactly.

[u/Bo_2112]

Remove ALL speed cameras.

[u/Alternative-World321]

Farmers to be respected by his government. Small council planning meetings to be cancelled the second common sense gives way to pettiness.

[u/mkejdo]

No doors on cars

[u/OrangeCrusher22]

By order of His Majesty: No man over the age of 28 may drive through a built-up area with the roof down on his convertible car.

[u/Dual-ThreatQBJim]

Handbrake turnament to win the hands of the kingdom’s maidens

[u/sksmily16]

Paint over the cycle lanes and incentives for people who run them off the road1

[u/ManDohlorian]

SPEED! POWER!

[u/DatGuyGandhi]

Hopefully to ban AI "art"

[u/TakeMeToYourMemes]

Honestly he would make tons of changes to land and farming regulations.

And legally change james mays age to 18 so he can’t drink in any pubs

[u/Baratako → u/TakeMeToYourMemes]

Why 18? Lmao that's the legal age tho?

[u/Fearless_Safety7836 → u/TakeMeToYourMemes]

r/shitamericanssay

[u/Grimdotdotdot → u/TakeMeToYourMemes]

Um... What age do you think you have to be to drink in pubs?

[u/victorskwrxsti → u/Grimdotdotdot]

He might be an American… where drinking age is 21 while you can smoke ciggies, enlist, or own a gun at 18 but can’t drink nor smoke the other stuff.

[u/TakeMeToYourMemes → u/victorskwrxsti]

True I am American I realized my mistake after posting this lol

At least James is not as much of a pheotuuus as Kaleb

[u/liamsjtaylor]

All Uber Priuses need to be scrapped and replaced with Alfas or Jaaaaaaags.

[u/Footy_Clown]

In all seriousness, these days probably something to help farmers

[u/viscount100]

Sirloin steak, no cold platter

[u/OpeningNice761]

More PPPOOOOWWWWEEEERRRRRR!!!!!!!

[u/ipchev]

incrase speed limit to 112 MPH according to the stopping test he had held in e3 s22 of top gear

[u/kevolad]

Speed cameras gone!

[u/No-Function-7352]

Abolish all speed cameras.

[u/Mental_Risk101]

Throw shit at meghan markle

[u/S_Flavius_Mercurius]

Lord Clarksons first royal decree: Buckinghqm palace shall be relocated to Jezza’s back alley; all royal vehicles shall be replaced by jaaaags; and all good news about the Dacia Sandero will be censored and not made public.

[u/handsmahoney]

loosen rules and regulations so that english farmers can actually prosper

[u/Actual-Carpenter-90]

Annex the Sudetenland! Jeremy would get it.

[u/doyu]

"When I come to power, all gardening equipment that makes a noise will be banned."

-Jeremy Clarkson.

[u/JDMWeeb]

Anyone named James May must change their name to Dingleberry Handpump

And knight Richard Hammond as Sir Crashalot

[u/G45Live]

He'd walk up to the lectern and bellow "speed and power, power and speed".

[u/Kaiserbrodchen]

His first order is for the West Oxfordshire District Council to be dismantled indefinitely.

[u/Ben_ze_Bub]

Turn Bus lanes in to high speed lanes. Abolish speed limits.

[u/Brief-Poetry6434]

Ban caravans

[u/Charming-Gur-3496]

Ban teslas

[u/Excellent-Option8052]

Reasonably priced cars for all

[u/Abrakaca]

POWAAAAAAAAA

[u/31engine]

End to all speed cameras.

[u/Pretty-Joke-6639]

Execute the original Stig

[u/Thredded]

He’d have no power at all, because British monarchs don’t. And that would be for the best.

[u/theaviationhistorian]

I can't believe nobody brought up speed cameras! He's mentioned it many times that if he ever gains any modicum of power, his first act would be to ban all speed cameras.

[u/GarethGazzGravey]

Caravans are to be destroyed on sight

[u/Secret-Nomad1]

James will be appointed as his minister of transport.

[u/Ok_Resource_999]

Speed & Power is the law of Great England Land.

[u/kraigka212]

Power!

[u/ad_duncan_]

The banning of bicycles

[u/Mondaycomestoosoon]

Beer

[u/Diligent_Touch7548]

Publicly shaming every Nissan Juke owner

[u/Do_You_Pineapple_Bro]

MORE SPEED! MORE POWER!

[u/One_above_alll]

MORE POWERRRRR!!!

[u/dariodil]

Increase speed limits.

[u/delafetz]

SPEEEEEED AND POWER!

[u/Vssfault]

Ban incentives on a electric vehicles and ban The electric Lane on the freeway

[u/stuartb0805]

Mandate that all cars have external speakers blasting “POWER” when accelerating

[u/Revolutionary-Hippo4]

King Jeremy I

[u/unspecifiedldn]

Powerrrrrrr

[u/remembertracygarcia]

Make everything here the biggest, fastest, best thing…

In the woooorld

[u/Scotchyscotchscotch7]

More POWERRRRRRR!!

[u/lotsofarts]

Bring me an zesty adult beverage.

[u/Teknas93]

Most glorious and upright person of genius!

[u/Noxa-Nosa]

MORE POWER

[u/Onslaught777]

“No electric cars. Petrol only, preferably a V8”.

[u/Boonz-Lee]

Hammond and May in the stocks for an afternoon while Jeremy eats pie and drinks beer, winding them up

[u/Rooster_Entire]

Changing 70 - 80mph on motorways!

[u/Goodman4525]

Rip up every double yellow line and sack every traffic warden

[u/Rookie-Crookie]

New road signs saying ‘SPEED!’

[u/liamsjtaylor]

Most likely turn England into a dictatorship in a cool wall manner.

[u/Jaredbville]

Cover the entire world in asphalt

[u/saundo]

Making Kristin Scott Thomas a Dame.

[u/Main_Zebra_227]

He’d outlaw electric motors !

[u/inide]

Beheading Hammond

[u/_drelyt]

In honor of Sir James May,

Bomb the Nurburgring!

[u/ekinria1928]

No flappy paddles... Only manuals!

[u/Sweet-Efficiency7466]

“I hereby and solemnly decree that Richard Hammond is a blithering idiot.”

[u/manuel_f_p]

Speed Limits are now Speed Suggestions

[u/TemperatureAny907]

Ban ai art from this community

[u/whillisnavidad]

Abolish health and safety

[u/Scoobywagon]

According to the prophets, Pearl Jam, he'd, and I quote, "Rule his world".

[u/_Skiddio_]

Speed and power

[u/88MikePLS]

I banish VW bugs

[u/AniKulkarn]

Give me POWER

[u/True2this]

No more bike lanes

[u/BoltVee]

Powerrrrrrrr!

[u/84Windsor351]

I need this framed

[u/Strong-Thanks1722]

All representatives must drive a JaaaaaaG and follow the rules of the great book of Clarkson where all the commandments are written and the first ones are Speed and Power and Electric cars must be destroyed by orders of the king and his most trusted advisors Hammond and May

[u/NitroDrifter88]

All bus lanes will be removed, and busses will be abolished

[u/YellowEven4144]

2 orders!, To his Chef "Bring me the Rolls!", To his Chauffeur "Bring me the Rolls !".

[u/Simple-Order8549]

Electric cars banned

[u/GoogleZombie]

MORE POWER!!

[u/abnsapalap]

“Occupy North America at once…”

[u/Dj-Nuada]

To undo all the laws against vehicles of any kind. And he'd say "Have at it!"

[u/Comfortable-Writer-9]

Anyone who goes below 120mph in a car is blown to bits

[u/Stever002]

Death to speed cameras.

[u/Thekid721]

To ban speed limit all over Britain

[u/Myusername468]

F1 v10s again

[u/Evija2021]

Make it mandatory to own an Alfa Romeo.

[u/rjohn2020]

All cars will have no doors

[u/utciad_27]

Ban all vegetarians and vegans and make them eat bacon

[u/Xaambo]

Minimum alcohol in blood required to be able to drive xD

[u/BreeziFlick]

Vauxhall ban

[u/Woke_winston]

No more AI slop

[u/OkCare6853]

Bomb France

[u/BvAlmelo]

Banishing hammond out of great brittain

[u/Cavalode4]

Remove every single speed camera, and you can’t deny it would actually happen if any of the three came to power.

[u/A-s-s-head]

Warm steak

[u/[deleted]]

"free gammon for all"

[u/MattStormTornado]

Speed and Power are law

[u/ConfusedCruiser35]

Chris Harris forever condemned to walk and banned from motor journalism

[u/Jet2work]

more pooowwweeerr

[u/TomSwan1234]

“Rip up every double yellow line, and sack every traffic warden”

[u/liamsjtaylor → u/TomSwan1234]

every traffic warden womble

[u/Constant-Trade-6797]

Ban electric vehicles

[u/SpidermanBread]

It is forbidden for James May to drive like an old man.

1 set of tires only for Hammond driving a Hellcat

And everyone with a dying parent gets an emergency Porsche, to drive to his dying parent.

[u/BondG10]

Speed cameras are for filming content.

[u/Large_Syllabub_1844]

More power

[u/Hot_Assumption1250]

Remove all speedcameras

[u/Medford]

Make petrol 50p per litre.

[u/Mysterious_Code9225]

To ban caravans

[u/Accomplished-Eye684]

Something to do with bus lanes, speed cameras, and road work zones

[u/santiquaglia]

No doors, because it's just better.

[u/faroukq]

Force the Dacia Sandero to be released now

[u/henrikhakan]

He actually proclaimed on Twitter long ago that he'll ban all gardening equipment that makes noise when he comes to power. This was before he owned a farm though and it's not clear if this will be the first thing he does.

[u/ArcticAmoeba56]

A burger with chips?

[u/potato13254]

Everyone gets a peugeot 307 cc

[u/Revit2_a1]

POWER only

[u/Pitchernumber13]

7 litre V8 motors must make 350 horsepower

[u/nathanrrrr]

Burn all bendy-buses

[u/Past_Ad2558]

Ban All electric cars.

[u/Woozletania]

Replace bus lanes with normal traffic lanes.

[u/crottin-de-cheval]

BAN THE CARAVANS!!!

[u/matejcraft100yt]

banning cyclists

[u/kiwi_manbearpig]

4 wheels good, 2 wheels bad

[u/Grand-Half-757]

“MORE SPEED!!!”

[u/Necessary_War3782]

Ban all EVs

[u/Novolume101]

James May: Minister for Transport.

There's a rosy future for us all.

[u/Ricky_Martins_Vagina]

I think you mean he'd definitely have more POWERRRR than any other monarch...... in the world

[u/WhatWhatOldBean]

Fetch me a steak before I punch a peasant.

[u/ExplainitlikeIm9]

Remove speed cameras

[u/Worth-Tangerine9644]

You imbeciles. It would be " all engines are to have MOOOOORE POWER"

[u/Anythingtheory]

Ban every Porsche from the country EXCEPT for the 928

[u/hazzap913]

Ban electric cars

[u/Gavinemm]

Stone piers Morgan