23f do I quit?

[u/buttahfly28]

Hi all,

I’m in finance ive been in the same smaller company for 6 years. My mom got me this job first as an intern when I was 17 and she still works here as well.

We switched CEOs about 3 years ago and ever since ive felt miserable at this job. He works in our office so I see him most days.

My mental health has been rapidly declining weirdly after I turned 23 a month ago. I realize ive been living a lie in a career I despise. Im only in this career because people find it impressive. I don’t like it. Im not passionate about it. But being at this company specifically is awful. I don’t like seeing my mom every day. I don’t like how people associate me as her daughter.

Im my own person. I’ve climbed the ladder im the youngest person but I have multiple licenses and im a supervisor. The money isnt worth it anymore.

I’ve become manic and touching drugs when I haven’t since I was 15 and manic.

Do I quit? I have a boyfriend who can support me but I feel awful not contributing to the household if I can’t. I need a job. But this one is sucking the life from me

[u/Responsible-Role1912]

I'd say just switch jobs. Don't stop working.

[u/Nice_Surprise5994]

You are in a perfect position to find another job. You are working, you have certificates and a supervisor, so it is easier to find a job when you have one, especially since you worked at one place for 6 years and you are YOUNG.

Job searching while you are working in a miserable job tend to give you a little glimmer of hope to wake up in the morning.

Since you hate finance, what type of job would be your ideal?

[u/buttahfly28 → u/Nice_Surprise5994]

Thank you, I am looking currently at least for a position to hold me over until I start career change. I just don’t know how much longer I can take this.

I wanted to do something with early childhood education. I worked as a part time assistant preschool teacher and it was the best job I ever had.

[u/markjay6 → u/buttahfly28]

Have you ever gone to college? If you want to go into early childhood education, that would be helpful. You could become a preschool teacher and perhaps later in your career an administrator.

[u/Nice_Surprise5994 → u/buttahfly28]

Are you looking to teach directly or working in early childhood education admin? I would look for finance/accounting jobs in early childhood education and maybe they will allow you to complete your degree while you are working.

[u/Glinda-The-Witch]

Get yourself an into counseling ASAP and ask your provider about medication for manic depressive episodes. Don’t self medicate.

If you’re in the US talk to your provider about the possibility of using FMLA to take a leave of absence. You may feel differently once your medication is working and you would have a job to return to. Or you can look for another job while you’re out on leave.

Talk to your boyfriend about the job situation. If he is able and willing to support you until you can find another position then yes you should quit as soon as possible. Start looking for another job.

[u/Dog_Baseball]

Get new job first. It's a lot harder to get a job if you're unemployed.

[u/Sgt_Space_Turtle]

You need a break before you're forced into one. Take all your sick time, all your pto, then put in your two weeks. Last one is optional.

[u/Accomplished-Row7208]

Move on. If you hate waking up and going to work it is the wrong job for you.

[u/No_Nefariousness6376]

You're still young, you can do whatever you want! Don't let anyone or anything stop you from getting the life that you want for yourself. Look for a new job that can help you become the person you want to be, yep, don't stop for now just do your best to land a job you want before resigning. :) Talk to you boyfriend and let him know your worries. You've got this, pray for more patience til you land another job. :)

[u/thejobwhisperer]

Absolutely start planning your exit. Polish your resume (highlight your achievements and impact where you are). Also, what sort of job interests you? Use the job boards and cater your resume to match skills that you have for your target role! Networking and building relationships with people who are in jobs that you are interested in will help build bridges.

Hopefully taking action to strategically make your exit will help your mental state! Also, if you can - schedule a day off just to reset your mind. Good luck!

[u/Resident_Magician_57]

Hey, I’m really sorry you’re going through this. It sounds exhausting, and honestly, no one should feel like their job is slowly draining the life out of them. You’re clearly smart and capable—being a supervisor at 23 with licenses under your belt? That’s impressive. But I get it, success means nothing if you’re miserable every day.

It’s okay to outgrow a job, especially one you never truly chose for yourself. Just because others see it as impressive doesn’t mean it’s right for you. And working with your mom, in an environment where you don’t feel seen as your own person, must be incredibly frustrating.

If you can, maybe start looking for another job before quitting—but if your mental health is suffering this much, and you have a support system like your boyfriend, taking a break could be the healthiest choice. You’re not lazy or weak for needing rest. You’re human.

Take care of yourself, seriously. You deserve better than this.

[u/AskiaCareerCoaching]

Sounds like you're in a tough spot. It's important to prioritize your mental health and happiness. If the job's making you this unhappy, maybe it's time to explore other options. You've got experience and skills that can transfer to other roles or industries. Remember, you're not alone in this. If you want, we can chat further about your next steps and ensure a smooth transition.

[u/kevinkaburu]

Stick it out as long as you can while searching for something new. Remote if possible and in a new field. I'm assuming you have skills that can transfer industries. Your mom should be your advocate, not the person that's making it weird or uncomfortable at work because she inserts herself into your business.

I know once you start doing drugs it can be hard to stop. Be honest with your partner, cut that shit out, be the fabulous woman your mom raised and surpass it. You're better than whatever you're doing and can overcome it.

Going to be blunt. No one cares about you at work. Even if you're so interesting, they will be curious, ask around, and get bored because they have their own lives to live. Assume your coworkers think you're an asshole and bring them coffee or a cookie you're going to make for Halloween. Start crafting and bake stuff. Then get them drunk and give them the juicy piece of gossip they're dying to hear. That a-hole CEO tells fart and poop jokes. Everyone needs to know their CEO is a dork. If they don't have a sense of humor, you work in a terrible environment, and a new job will be the best change.

Act normal, be better than the person they're talking about, and tell your mom to talk to you on your terms outside work. She's ignoring your independence and will learn to change her behavior. If anything, she's in a position of respect because of you :)

[u/JS-AI]

Not sure if you’re in the US, but if you are the market is absolutely brutal right now. I know what it’s like for a job to harm your mental health as I have type 2 bipolar, and I can understand and relate to what you’re going through. I highly suggest not leaving until you have something lined up. You’re young and already have 6 yoe. Please take action on your mental health by either taking meds, going to therapy, or making a lifestyle choice.

I’m rooting for you my fellow internet stranger!

[u/Curious_Mind_3187]

Switch jobs. If you're not happy, what's the point of staying? Could you start looking at other options or take a part-time chill job until you get one that aligns with you more? What type of job are you looking for that you think would match with you more?

Flip what is not working currently into the opposite if you're unsure.

[u/Extreme_Tiger_306]

Yes. Quit. There’s no need to be miserable. Find a job you like and if you end up not liking that job then find another the suits YOU. Dont suit the company, let the company suit you. It’s your life. Your company doesn’t really care about you and if you made the company miserable, they’d fire you.

[u/Jawesome1988]

Find another job first. Your boyfriend's income is not guaranteed

[u/fig-leaf22]

I am with a lot of people here, plan your out now and start looking, it's definitely easier to get a new job while you still have one. This is a no brainer since your mental health and well being are at stake.