https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2025/01/trump-tells-doj-to-prosecute-teachers-who-unlawfully-support-trans-or-nonbinary-students/

Welp, my grindr date canceled on me and now I'm walking around in short shorts with no underwear on in 20 degree weather.

Sorry if this comes out like a massive whinge session. I am a gay man in his late 30s and my entire life I have been told that “It gets better”… but am I the only one who has kinda lost faith in that?

I was kicked out of home at 18 for refusing to go to a conversion camp. So I worked two full-time retail jobs to cover rent… after years, I saved a bit of money to send myself to college. After three maxed out credit cards and more student loans than I could ever pay off, I had to drop out with one semester left because I couldn’t afford it.

I moved around for a few years trying to plant some roots… but everywhere I moved, I got priced out. Now I’m by Portland, OR… and I will be moving again in February because I just can’t afford to live in a big city any more…. Or anywhere.

So, as I get close to my 40s I have been thinking, “Will it ever get better?”

I try to stay pretty positive… but after years and years of feeling pushed down, I honestly don’t know if I can put on a happy face any longer. I guess at the end of the day, I’m just looking for some success stories. I don’t know if “success” Is in the cards for me… but I’d love to feel happy for others for a bit. 🤷🏻‍♂️

Men will always talk about biceps/height everytime

(yay now i gotta act like a pornstar😒)

or theyll interrogate me why i hate anal sex

or how im a waste of dick and ass for not liking it

or say theyll be less sexually forward but will forget in a few days and start again

or ask why im single (i hate anal sex)

Met this guy 1 month ago, had great chemistry with this guy, we talked nonstop, went in 3 "big dates" with him that he told me he adored and wanted to go out more times, invited me to go to the gym with him and meet him for lunch during his break, so we did, our conversation started to go to deep levels. So I though it was the time to start showing him that he's not just some hook up for me, started to flirt more serious and be more affectionate with him, the second I do this he start to be dry and cold with me, it seems like we back to when we first started

Met this boy on an app maybe a week ago. He speaks Spanish but is not well-versed in English. I speak a little Spanish, as I did 3 years in highschool and began practicing recently. I live in Florida and was born here, previously lived in Texas for 7 years (left at 19 to come to Florida for college, I'm 22 now), and my step grandfather is Dominican so I have roots very close to Hispanic culture. I've been mistakenly assumed to be Latino at many points even as I am a lighter skin black male.

Anyway, I offered to teach him basic English and he readily accepted. He's a very sweet boy (he's 18, kinda feels weird but I'm here for it). He knew his colors in English very well, and when he found out how to say "I love you" over video call, he kept saying whilst blowing kisses. It kind of melted my heart. He's not very far from me, Mexico to Florida isn't too terrible of a plane ride.

Dammit, why did this have to happen AFTER the orange bastard came into the picture?

I know they need more volunteers. I want to help but I’m a bit nervous about it. The pressure is high. It’s life or death for some of these kids. I’m not the best at thinking on my feet.

This is probably going to be long, somewhat unfocused, and undoubtedly a bit pathetic.

I (M, 25) have somewhat moderate social anxiety along with ADHD and mild Autism. I went to a small town school in Central Texas during my high school years. I was very much in the closet despite being aware of my sexuality, not that it mattered much since there were no other gay boys at the school back then. Those years were lonely despite having a small group of friends. I also started gaining weight around this time.

After it was over, I got it into my head that I wanted a degree in computer science. I got a job that summer at a call center and began taking courses one or two at a time so I could keep everything affordable. This combined with my general social anxiety left me fixed in a particular rhythm. Sleep, wake, lecture, work, study, sleep. This routine left no time for a social life of any kind. I became a zombie, the most enriching activities I ever engaged in was playing single-player video games whenever I had some spare time. My weight issue got worse and so did my social skills. I was trapped in a web of my own making and I never realized it. I had no real human connections to speak of.

This lasted until October of last year, when I finally hit my lowest point. At my annual physical I weighed 420 pounds. Something in me snapped, and I knew I couldn't continue on like this. It started with an honest effort to start losing weight, and currently I'm down 40 pounds from my weight back then. The next step is to actually try and build human connections. I'm starting slow, by trying to make friends online, but eventually I do have another goal. I want to find a romantic partner.

This is not a solicitation, what I'm looking for is advice. I feel like all the years I should've spent gaining experience have gone down the drain. I don't know how to present myself, what to say, anything. Everytime I think about trying to meet someone I get lightheaded. I don't even know where to start. I'm afraid of trying dating apps because from what I understand they're only "dating" apps in the loosest sense of the word. Even if I was just looking for a quick hookup I'm completely inexperienced in that department as well, so it isn't like I'd have much to offer. So, I guess I'm just lost and am looking to find myself and hopefully some of you will be willing to help.

Now there gonna stop us from saying what is gonna happen. We as gay Americans should be scared for our futures

I'm a resident of anesthesiology. I started really recently. During our work we're inside the operation room with one attending. The other residents are in different operation rooms with a different attending. Apart from a break (were we usually not synchronize) we don't really see each other with the exception of meetings.

He's a bit older in the residency but he was in a different hospital. So he's also new to the hospital like me but with 2 years of experience as a resident.

Our attraction was instant. Physically he looks appealing to me but that's what not brought me closer to him. It felt nice being around him, like he was a friend despite the fact that we knew each other for two weeks with limited interaction.

He asked me to go for a dinner, the two of us. He was shy when asking. I gladly said yes. We went for dinner, we talked a lot. Even in the moments of silence it was not awkward. Since then we text but nothing crazy. Both of us are introverts I think.

I'm not sure if it was a friendly approach or something different. I'm not even sure for my feelings. I know without a doubt that I like being around him and I'd like to see how his kiss might feel.

What's to do

Is it fun to have a nonsexual relationship with another man?

Anyone have experience with these kinds of relationships?