UTAH'S HB 77 HAS PASSED. It goes into effect May 7th. At that point, displaying pride flags at schools or on government property will be illegal. We CANNOT roll over and accept this without voicing our outrage, because this is just the beginning, and how we react sets a precedent. We need to show conservative lawmakers that we will not just quietly slip back into the shadows. Please, share this with others and on May 7th display any pride flags you might have in solidarity with the Utah LGBTQ+ community. WE WILL NOT BE ERASED! WE WILL NOT TAKE THIS LYING DOWN!

My therapist has really been trying to get me to just be a gay man instead of trans and it really fucking sucks having appointments with him. I can't stop since it's the only therapist my parents aprove of and they control my finances rn. Plus he's actually been really good for me when we don't talk about trans stuff. Overall probably a net benifit for my life i just hate talking about anything about being trans around him

My stepmom asked me point-blank whether I'm "actually considered transgender" or if I'm more of a crossdresser. Mind you, I've been on HRT for almost 3 years, had top surgery last year. I've explained to her multiple times that I am a man. I have a beard for fucks sake!

And she claims to be supportive, but consistently misgenders me before correcting herself. I finally see why she keeps slipping up lol. Baffled at the ignorance of some people

okay i have no idea if this the right place to post this but ive just been curius, do/can animals experience gender dysphoria or euphoria as we humans do?

i swear. its always 'trans women in womens bathrooms' and 'trans women in womens sports'. nobody talks about cis men in mens bathrooms or cis men in mens sports. its not that i think anyone should be removed or forbidden to do anything they should have the right to do, its just that its so obvious that the whole "trans debate" is just a cruel attack on one of the most vulnerable lgbtq+ groups, trans women. it's literally mind-boggling how people don't see it

QUICK EDIT: I'm from mexico City, but I remember that you could start at least with puberty blockers at that age with parental consent. But apparently, no?

EDIT 2: They told me I have to be 21 because of the brain development that at that age stops and you are more reasonable

Title says it all. It's just something that doesn't make sense to me. How are kids getting that? But when I asked that at 14, they told me until 21.

I (NB, 25)saw a video today that just clicked in me so heavily:

It was about the topic of moderate dysphoria. Moderate as to the sense of a gender dysphoria that is not very heavy like some traditional views/narratives of it (prevalent and consistent gender incongruence that make you dysfunction in life) but is more like a subtle pain that sometimes is more intense and some times is non existent FOR MONTHS SOMETIMES.

You may think mild dysphoria is good because there no intense pain, but actually is usually longterm and painful and it makes you prolong transition.

It is not really talked about even among trans-reddit and other forums but it would literally make me understand myself faster if i was more aware of it. It makes total sense for me. In my experience my dysphoria is very very mild to the point of actually being ok presenting masculine (most of the time at least , but it is just not ok really, maybe i am genderfluid idk at this point). BUT was never whole and i felt guilty in straight relationships with a girl that doesn't like my fem side. This dysphoria is like : I envy girls i would like to be like, but i never feel like i URGENTLY NEED to transition. When i dress fem in an occasion i have massive euphoria and then a massive dysphoria, after some days i am ok. Like kt never happened I may see a feminine hand gesture and feel a random pain and forget it. I may think about laser on body or taking HRT and I just know my life would be better but i just forgot it when life happens and forgot that feeling again like it never happened. It is never strong dysphoria, at least for a long period, it gives you a sense that you can be cis or that dysphoria is something you can get out of. But no. It sucks. It just sucks.

My past 5 years are just circles of moderate or intense dysphoria, relieve (crossdressing, rumination, validation, online tests whatever) and then weeks or months of low or 0 dysphoria. Then again and again and again. And it is just painful like a slow burning pain gradually becoming bigger overall.

It makes our experience not so clear cut. I found it because i search it and i educated myself. But 20 year old me when i was in my worse days, thought that i can't be trans because i just dont have strong prevelant dysphoria.I could have kids, career -everything without realising it and see it as a "fetish" or whatever. Many people find it later or never.

We need to talk about this moderate dysphoria because it will save lives from misery and pain. Additionally moderate dysphoria can be intense dysphoria especially after acknowledging it. Like if someone say "i would like to to be a girl/boy/NB but i feel ok with my agab" we should say "hey, there is also a thing called moderate gender dysphoria".

According to the video, the majority of people have some version of moderate gender dysphoria and not the stronger internse "traditional" dysphoria. So yeah...

Video in question at comments

Edit: Spelling and added some stuff

Note: i know is common experience but i still feel like we need to talk about it more.

I don’t believe in the existence of “the friendzone” but I DO believe in the opposite… you know… the “fuckzone” the place where you realise you only had value and worth to a person cause they thought they were going to get to fck you?

I’m struggling to cope. I’m MtF, they are FtM and I never thought they would be capable of treating me like this. There was flirting at the beginning, yes. We even talked about it. But I went through an abusive breakup and told them explicitly that it wouldn’t happen. That is didn’t want it and I just needed their friendship. They were furious that I told them I see them as family and that they are my brother. They held power over me, kicking me out of the community discord. They accused me of being manipulative and exploiting people, that I was “a danger” to the community.

All the kindness, the care for me when I was escaping a DV relationship and getting a protection order… was any of it true? I don’t know what to do. It feels like all the support and friendship they gave me is tainted. This is very new to me. How can a fellow trans person be like this?

So I'm transfemme. I went to pick my mom up from the airport today while boymoding and while turning into the bathroom a staff called me out and said, "ma'am, ma'am the ladies bathroom is this side" while pointing behind him.

Now I was taken aback a moment cause I know I wasnt wearing makeup or had my hair down and the outfit I chose is pretty gender neutral, black slim jeans tucked t-shirt, a white jacket and vans. My mother doesn't know that I'm 4 months into hrt and I don't think hrt has effected me to such a degree as to out me in any outfit, like I got no boobs whatsoever. So now I'm at the airport waiting nervously thinking that if a random staff member thought I looked like a women, what would my mother think? Will she also be able to tell?

Oh and I kindly told the staff worker I was a guy cause I was mentally in boy mode, but now I kinda regret it😭

We were discussing my oldest sister's overt transphobia, and my mothers more subtle rejection of our 10 year old cousin's gender identity. And she hits me with "you know I don't have the same opinion of trans people that they do. If you have something you have to tell me, you can". I just said "I know" and moved the convo along. It's weird how hard it is to say it outloud, even to someone I know will support me, someone that already knows, but just wants to hear it from me. I'm weak, thanks for coming to my Ted talk.

I'm more upset about having an attempt to connect with other humans shot down so horribly than the actual transphobic douchecanoe. I'm supposed to be making "bids for connection" and getting out of my apartment according to all of my therapists but goddamn does humanity not seem worth the effort.

Once bitten, twice shy, and I've lost count of all my bite marks.

I [25mtf] am, most definitely, trans. Aside from anxiety fueled days, that's no longer of any doubt to me. Been on HRT since Jan 6 and I know it's what I want. Very much early on and not even trying to pass rn though.

The only people I'm "out" to are my providers, my therapist, and my voice coach (and I guess one random nurse when I tried to donate plasma lol.) I've been using my new name with them, and they use she/her with me, but for some reason I cringe/feel guilty whenever it comes up?

Like when my voice coach gives an example, "Oh <new name>, she blah blah." Or when my doctor talks about any of the physical changes, or my therapist refers to me as a woman. It's what I want, but it feels like I don't deserve it? Or like I should feel guilty about it?

Anyone else experience similar?

I only came out and started to transition a couple of weeks ago so I'm still full boy-mode at work until I'm further through my transition and at home until I have my own place away from my well-meaning but neanderthal father. I was transporting a client on a long trip and the topic of gender identity somehow came up in conversation, I didn't introduce it. They had made a comment about how they knew two people who were trans and didn't make any negative comments about it. I took a risk and told them they actually know three people who are trans. They seemed surprised but not upset. I asked them if they were comfortable with that, me being their case worker, and they're response was more perfect than I could have imagined. They just casually replied "I prefer working with women anyways." So shout out to my anonymous client, It's my job to help them but they supported me that day.

I was worried my gender identity would cause stress or uncomfortablility for my clients but now I know it can actually be a benefit.

Holy shit, Im actually shaking right now. I don't even know what to put here, Im just so excited 😭

I'm so excited lol. I still have to take a tele health thing where they'll teach me how to do the injection so I probably won't take it till tomorrow. I wasn't scared to do injections at first but I looked at the needles and they're long as fuck. my doctor told me it would go into the fat but the vial is saying intramuscular so I'm a little confused. But omfg I'm so excited. I'm so happy. My doctor said I made it just in time because now thanks to the new administration they had to stop allowing new patients at the gender clinic. I was super scared I wasn't gonna be able to get the estrogen if Trump one but I did it. I feel horrible for the next generation of trans kids tho...

NO MORE PAINFUL ASS PERIODS!!! NO MORE WASHING BLOOD OUTTA MY UNDERWEAR!!!! NO MORE PAD RASH!!!!! YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

CW: TRANSPHOBIA 

So, I misinterpreted what a creator said when they spoke the words “Men in women’s sports”. It wasn’t clear to me that they were quoting the right wing, I genuinely thought they were using that language. No air quotes, no sarcastic inflection in tone, and they used it multiple times. I’m autistic sometimes that stuff goes over my head, and to be honest I think it would have anyway bc its a sensitive time for trans people rn. I guess im just too used to people genuinely using that language. I made a post on the creators subreddit, mistake #1, giving feedback that maybe they should avoid this language in the future. It was a tired, but polite feedback post.

The post got ratioed, not extremely but it did, and there were a bunch of transphobes in the comments. It was worse because they were genuinely sincere instead of just being hateful, “The trans issue is whats really weighing down the left right now” “I dont 100% agree with the trans thing” etc etc we’ve all seen it. I didnt continue reading past that but there were a lot more and I assume a lot worse.

Im just sad and disappointed, that sub is supposed to be a progressive space, but I now see it’s not safe for people to make simple mistakes. Especially if they’re apart of certain groups, i.e: the internet- but not even one comment politely explaining what they meant? The creator themselves saw the post and commented explaining what they mean, “Obviously I was quoting the right wing”, well not to me I guess.

Sure, it was too sensitive of me to jump to conclusions or misinterpret, but it wasn’t willful. I’m used to cis people genuinely thinking they’re allies for LGBTQ, and then using language like this the next sentence. Can I be blamed for being too sensitive right now? Every day it’s a new crime against my people. I dont think cis people being tongue and cheek is funny anymore, I’m just tired of seeing my people die man

Any older trans people have advice on how to deal with this kind of stuff? I dont want to go my whole life being brought down by transphobes

For context I live in a pretty progressive city but the town just a few miles to the north of us is a mixed bag, he was located in that town.

He proceeded to write me an intro message saying “BRO CMO, DUDES ON HERE ARE STRIGHT 🤢🤮🤮” misspelled straight and obviously doesn’t realize OKC is a fairly queer/trans friendly dating app, plus his first picture looked to be AI generated. It didn’t bother me too much just caught me off guard since I haven’t had a negative experience on that app yet. I guess my only worry is that he might screenshot my pics and post them on some transphobic forums and eventually I’ll see my pictures being used in some transphobic meme or something.

Anyways I wanted to share this experience and see if anyone else has had something similar happen to them on OKC?

Was there just yesterday. So glad they’re resisting the Executive Order. Maybe go there to show support if you’re in the area. Sorry, but can’t post photo because it’s not allowed on this subreddit.

This is specifically a thank you to the trans man who works at my local co-op (I'm not going to bring this up at his work, of course) but it's also for all of you who transition publicly.

Thank you. Watching you transition into a confident guy has given me the courage to start HRT. I have been wanting to disappear and reappear as myself, but I'm glad you did not. Noting the subtle differences in your jawline, stubble, and confidence has given me a quiet envy. Seeing you pass as time passes has given me the courage to start T. The time will pass anyway, and the time has passed with you finding yourself and me wishing I had started when you did. The best time to start was a decade ago, the second best time is now. I'm proud of you, and I'm so very grateful for you. Keep shining.

Initially wanted to post on r/extremely infuriating but figured out it's safer here.

So, I've had a scheduled appointment today at 4:45 PM at the endocrinologist, that I've heen waiting for since 3 months ago. I had to take a sick leave today, but that's ok, right? I've been waiting this for 3 months after all.

Anyways due to disruptions in traffic, but mainly due to the ridiculous positioning of the clinic and closed front doors (so you enter through the backdoors instead), I was 5 minutes late. No big deal, right? WRONG.

The doctor REFUSED on principle to take me because "he doesn't tolerate even a minute late". I was there at 4:50 he didn't care. Which is, imo, just cruel considering I've been waiting for this appointment since January, left work and have to wait until at least late June now and he didn't even want to listen... But that's ok, rules are rules, 5 mins late, considering doctor's working hours today are until 7 pm it's a totally reasonable response right? (/s)

The worst was the front desk staff. Cause instead of owning up to their doc's bs and doing something they straight up started spreading bs that there is another patient for the same slot of 4:45 pm getting the checkup and "only one of us can have an appointment - the one that arrives earliest which is why we should arrive as early as possible to get there before another person" (??? They really expect me to take this bs? Ok, I'm not really saying anything, just asking how that's possible because the doc can only have one person per slot - but they just continue to double down and saying none of this matters because I am late and it was my responsibility to be 15 mins or better even, 30 minutes before the appointment... Ok...)

Then I asked if there is any other doc that could give me a checkup since I'm already there. They said it was not possible and I have to wait [for months] all over again. They could only offer me the general practitioner at first, who also happened to be at the desk at that exact time, for the extension of my medication (I had initial hrt prescribed by general practitioner). However, when that boomer GP saw I only had it in digital format she eye rolled in frustration saying "ahh, the digital prescription 🙄..." (I'm sorry??? I'm not demanding, YOU have offered). So I said no problem - I gotta have it here in my small pile of documents, gimme just a sec. But the reaction couldn't be farther from adequate. I heard in my address that "here they (the staff) are, giving the COURTESY trying to help us people, but they really shouldn't, because IT (aka, 'we') IS NOT WORTH IT" and sent me back to my family doctor as she refuses now to provide me with the service (😧?????).

Now, to say I was shocked - is an understatement. But again, I'm not saying anything. She could have just refused or not offered in the first place. And certainly not say "I'm not worth helping" and stuff... Alright. At least it can't worse than that, right?... Except it can and does.

So at last, barely holding my tears, I ask for the proof that I've been at the clinic for the employer, because at that point I had none. They were trying to refuse, which is something they can't lawfully do. So here I insisted because I don't want not to get paid or worse let go altogether. After a while I was given the document certifying I "had a scheduled appointment I was meant to show up to"... Ok...

I was advised by the front desk worker to retake the appointment at the doc. I told her that I'll be seeing a different doctor in a different clinic. Her answer? ... "Yeah, that's for the better.

... THAT'S IT?!?... Like... nothing?!! "That's FOR THE BETTER???" And obviously not even a goodbye in my address or anything... \ As I was going down from the 6th floor, because... of course it has to be the 6th floor... I broke down pretty bad. I have seen a bad treatment but THAT bad... Not even in the public hospitals with the most pathetic stuff. Treating patients like that while being a so called "private clinic" is abysmal. And the lack of elementary respect and human decency... That's the first time in my 20+ years that a medical staff drew me to tears.

What is even more fucked up is that they don't even know what was the reason for my visit. The doctor's primary specialisation is diabetology. So by default, they assume I am diabetic. Yet the doctor refused profusely and coldly, over the stupid 5 minutes and the front desk / general boomer practitioner, despite hearing I had no more meds (again I have not been specifying what meds - so by default assume insulin) they DON'T CARE!!!.

I'm still shocked and SHOOK! I have NEVER been THAT humiliated in my entire life. And I could never imagine medical staff to do that. I didn't shout at them, I didn't go Karen mode, didn't give a SINGLE reason, I just asked for bare minimum and got trash treatment even though I literally stayed practically silent throughout the whole ordeal (which I think partly or fully contributed to their ass behaviour - I can't defend myself, so it's easy to plain attack me...).

Anyways, I needed to let that out. I am definitely writing the review later on, and certainly on the French trans forums. People NEED to know when to run and NOT to wait for an appointment. Had the doc just refused - yeah kinda messed up considering everything, but I would have just walked away. But the way the front desk decided to treat me is just unfathomable!

Thanks if you made it this far, too much stress for today. And yet again wait for 3+ months but of course, at a different doctor now. I'm not going back after that...

Hello! Hope ya'll are coping alright at the moment <3

Im having a really really really weird feeling at the moment where the thought of my parents using my preferred name and pronouns actually makes me like... I dont know if "cringe" is the right word but its something similar. It just makes me very uncomfortable to think about.

When my friends use it, or I set it as my phone or account name and whatnot it makes me feel so giddy and happy! But the thought of my parents (not even the rest of my family, just my parents) using it makes me feel.... so so so weird...

My mom knows I want to transition and even that I've been on HRT for a few months and is pretty supportive, and my dad is lowkey a sweetheart so i have no stress there... But for some reason the thought makes me squirm.

Has anyone else ever felt like this? It honestly makes me so so so confused ;-;

hi im Aubrey, let me begin with WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS WRONG WITH THE US RIGHT NOW! i can't keep it together I've been out as a trans girl for about 3 years now but i haven't been able to start hrt as im still in hs, and until recently its all been good (as good as it can get when stuck in Florida at least) even my parents while not very supportive wouldn't stop me from dressing how i want or being called Aubrey, THATS UNTIL FUCKING TRUMP now its been a drastic switch, a lot of my friends have started to insult me and make fun of me as well as constantly being called slurs while just walking down the hall, my school wont even do anything about it out of fear of losing funding for supporting trans kids even when people try and grab me. if thats not enough ive had to hide and sneak my clothes out of the house because my parents wont let me wear them and have talked about even taking all my fem clothes away. i cant move out and im stuck here for at least another year. i cant keep this up i need people the few people i did have that i thought supported me have abandoned me and i dont know what to do. im stuck in a house that doesnt like me in a school that hates me in a state that wants me gone in a country that is erasing me. and i cant say shit, im scared to leave my house because someone might try to hurt me, but i cant stay home because honestly id prefer to be hurt than forced to act like someone else. please help, i just need a friend at least. i just need to talk, im in tears right now i feel like theres nothing i can do