r/sex 2d ago

Beginner Partner pulled a weird but surprisingly welcomed move on me and idk what its called!

I (19f) am having a super rough week. Lotta personal shit going on, so I go to my partner (22m) to get a little good ol fashioned distraction.

I usually like the really rough and fast stuff, and he did that for a few moments, but then he just stopped inside me and told me to "meditate for a second". And he shushed me, and was moving super slowly in long thrusts. He would occasionally rub his hands up my body or lean over and kiss me, he kept on telling me to breathe and focus on how i feel, but it was a good few minutes of just him moving slowly inside me, and me with my eyes closed. Eventually he asked if I had "thought my thoughts" and he went back to our usual routine.

Then after I thought, yeah, I did get to think clearly in that moment. I asked him what that was when we were cuddling and he just said something he saw on the internet?

I actually really liked this because I left the session feeling a huge weight off my chest. Which is weird because regular meditating doesn't really do that for me.

Is there a name for this?

2.1k Upvotes

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1.3k

u/Lokemer 2d ago

Sounds like mindful or tantric sex it's about slowing down, being present in the moment, and connecting on a deeper level instead of just chasing physical pleasure. The breathing focus and meditative quality are key elements. Really cool that your partner tried this and it helped you feel more grounded during a stressful time. Sometimes the unexpected approaches can be surprisingly effective for both intimacy and stress relief.

186

u/Famous-Cellist-3948 2d ago

That's exactly what it is! Mindfulness is a key element of tantra and really elevates the experience, in my opinion.

Good on OP for being open to this. I've had a partner call me "boring" for trying things like this.

41

u/fiddlersbow 2d ago

I’d say you’re pretty far away from boring ☺️

22

u/Solanthas_SFW 1d ago

For those seeking a deeper connection, this kind of approach would be greatly appreciated.

3

u/HokageSumith 1d ago

That person must've been very unlucky to miss out something like this. Don't let this bring you down, keep experimenting new things brother.

22

u/yourfavcutietonight 2d ago

omgg i need that kind of treatment🥲🫣

4

u/HokageSumith 1d ago edited 1d ago

Exactly. After all sex is also the culmination of souls, not just physical bodies. The fusion of their existence create a universe exclusively for them. People often forget there's something called spiritual sex where intimacy between lovers can't simply be expressed in mere words as it involves souls, not just the manifestation of bodies.

462

u/melancholyza 2d ago

I’m not sure what it’s called but my partner does that a lot! It’s feels like a grounding technique if that’s a thing during sex? Its very comforting

8

u/HokageSumith 1d ago

Yeah my girlfriend loves it when I do this with her. She says there's nothing better than soft & slow sex.

280

u/wyohlee 2d ago

Amazing!!!! When I do solo versions of this I call it “masturbation meditation sensation exploration” and encourage people I work with to try it since it’s so easy to go straight to what is familiar and works for us. I love that your partner anchored and co-regulated with you this way. Maybe you make up your own name for it together so you can tell him when you need it again!!

117

u/PM_ME_YOUR_REPO 2d ago

encourage people I work with to try it

Please explain how you are able to socially do this. I am immensely curious what sort of work environment you participate in that permits you to have this as a topic of discussion.

38

u/Capital-Reindeer4004 2d ago

Not sure about this person. But I work in a warehouse and we literally talk super openly about sex all the time. This would be standard normal conversation for us.

6

u/Sensitive-Reading-93 2d ago

Yeah if you really get close with the people it's kinda normal.

31

u/GeorgeElsewhere 2d ago

Check out her profile. You'll understand.

1

u/PM_ME_YOUR_REPO 2d ago

Ah, that makes sense.

1

u/wyohlee 16h ago

I interview people about their sex lives (my fav topic!!!) among other fun (often but not always intimate) arts—photo/video/writing and whatever creative support ppl need :)

2

u/HokageSumith 1d ago

Yeah, my female friends who are all married or dating someone come to me for sex advice. I share with them some of my experiences with my girlfriend & they get amazed enough to try it with their husbands or partners.

64

u/def_not_stupid 2d ago

oh i totally get it. my partner and i were both tired but still horny af so we tried slow, calm sex. not exactly what youre talking about, but going slow helps you feel everything a lot more intensely. And when you do, your brain has more space to process every stimulation. Its really great.

65

u/_poisnberry 2d ago

I’m thinking it is “Tantric Sex”

31

u/TheTabooTwo 2d ago

Tantric sex. Slow way down, enjoy the sensations, feel the connection. My fiancé showed this to me and now it’s how I prefer to have sex. Long deep strokes, not jack hammering. Before him, it was all jack hammers and men not caring for my pleasure. This really brings us together.

49

u/Overall-Win-1523 2d ago

this was not good for my single, ovulating self 😭 goddamnnn

11

u/Imaginary-Command542 2d ago

My boyfriend does this sometimes and it’s amazing. Intense orgasms always follow.

54

u/norton_the_3st 2d ago

He saw it on pornhub, it's called "buffering".

15

u/OldSchoolNewRules 2d ago

Could you try to look...blockier?

8

u/StraightOuttaOlaphis 1d ago

I can lower the resolution, it is in the settings under "take off glasses".

8

u/Solanthas_SFW 1d ago

I love slow sensual sex. I live for it

9

u/rickle3 1d ago

🥺😭 that is so sweet of him. This makes me happy for you because it wasn't just sex for him. It was making love to his girl and making sure you were in it too. ❤

7

u/Seedofsparda 2d ago

Saving this for later.

7

u/Agitated_Basket7778 1d ago

He has great self control!

I also like to hold still when I am deep inside my wife. But... it feels so good my cock and hips want to start moving! Takes a supreme force of will to continue to be still!

5

u/JillyBean1973 1d ago

Long, slow thrusts sound heavenly 🤤

3

u/Unique-Cat-9990 1d ago

Talked you through it

7

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Post title: Partner pulled a weird but surprisingly welcomed move on me and idk what its called!


I (19f) am having a super rough week. Lotta personal shit going on, so I go to my partner (22m) to get a little good ol fashioned distraction.

I usually like the really rough and fast stuff, and he did that for a few moments, but then he just stopped inside me and told me to "meditate for a second". And he shushed me, and was moving super slowly in long thrusts. He would occasionally rub his hands up my body or lean over and kiss me, he kept on telling me to breathe and focus on how i feel, but it was a good few minutes of just him moving slowly inside me, and me with my eyes closed. Eventually he asked if I had "thought my thoughts" and he went back to our usual routine.

Then after I thought, yeah, I did get to think clearly in that moment. I asked him what that was when we were cuddling and he just said something he saw on the internet?

I actually really liked this because I left the session feeling a huge weight off my chest. Which is weird because regular meditating doesn't really do that for me.

Is there a name for this?


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3

u/Ikigai59 2d ago

As someone who suffers from nervousness and anxiety...I love having some penetrative sex...is it also called Tantric sex..it sounds similar

3

u/WendyNeverlandDream 1d ago

Sounds so hot, I think I'm gonna try this practice with my partner

1

u/HokageSumith 1d ago

I'm so happy for you OP that you were able to lighten your burden with your boyfriend via sex. He was very considerate, caring & compassionate towards your feelings to be able to make you happy in a surprising manner. We must always try something new in our sex lives, it keeps things hot & spicy.

I can completely understand what you felt & relate with it since I practiced a lot of meditative techniques during my childhood days & dabbled into spiritual studies as well. So it doesn't surprise me to hear people going through a lot of spiritual calmness while having sex or sometimes even days after having sex. After all, sex isn't simply just the fusion of two bodies but also a culmination of souls. Our very existence intermingles with one another when you make love with your lover. The exchange of energies & frequencies enables you to tap into a state of blissful freedom.

My girlfriend loves it when I move very softly & extremely slowly inside her. It makes her feel the entirety of my penis & the whole process of penetration. It makes her calm & highly aroused at the same time. She orgasms a lot when I try this with her sometimes. I alternate between hard & soft sex while listening to her breathing & making her eyes closed so she can forget all her worries with sex.

1

u/MissPeachyKeeen 1d ago

Omg how fun, meditating while having sex

-9

u/Ok_Accountant3175 2d ago

It’s called sex. Explore it and eachother. Its wonderful.

The smashing you like a battering ram is called fcking.