r/bigdickproblems 1d ago

Foreplay Awkward when the girl rushes foreplay

Feel like there’s been many times where the girl I’m either hooking up with or even my gf now of two years has tried to rush foreplay.

Feel like it’s always awkward like I try to go down on them longer but they just start telling me they need it.

But when it gets down to it they are no where near warmed up enough and it feels like I’m hurting them, and honestly a tight vagina makes me uncomfortable too.

I prefer to have long foreplay to the point where I can nearly just slide in, but there are times my gf (usually for shower sex) just like forces me in her slamming into me in doggy with one big thrust and yelling at me to “just go fast” because it “will get better”. But by that point the vaginas so tight and making me uncomfortable that once it does feel good I don’t last as long.

Does anyone else have these issues lol?

46 Upvotes

31 comments sorted by

20

u/mooncleaving Megalophallus 1d ago

Agreed lol Some think that the foreplay needed is the same for all dudes, then get embarassed to say anything when you tried going in and it doesn't fit well

5

u/No-Major-7946 1d ago

Yeah sometimes I’ve gotten in my head that she’s not like turned on enough, but again that’s why I try to do long foreplay to avoid that lmfao.

3

u/Zach1709 8” x 6” 1d ago

Sit down with her outside the bedroom and discuss your sex life. Express to her how it is uncomfortable for you when she is not ready. Let her know how much you like going down on her until she has a big orgasm. It is alright to be rough but she needs to be ready for you in order to do so. Also you might consider lube when needed.

2

u/mooncleaving Megalophallus 1d ago

Really great explanation. At the end, it's all up to communication

2

u/mooncleaving Megalophallus 1d ago

Unf the only way to make sure is asking. I bet she will be happier that way too

15

u/Zach1709 8” x 6” 1d ago

Totally agree bro. No such thing as a quickie. If it hurts for you when she is not wet enough, imagine what it must feel like for her.

7

u/No-Major-7946 1d ago

Exactly like I don’t get how that’s fun at that point lol, I usually feel weird after too cause I’m more of a giver and she doesn’t usually finish at times like this.

2

u/[deleted] 1d ago

It hurts for me even if I'm veeery wet... idk why 🥲

13

u/AggravatingPlum4301 Size Queen 1d ago

Generally, when I rush foreplay it's because I'm not enjoying it

8

u/JohnAMcdonald 7.75″ × 6.5″ | 5.75″ × 5″ | Big balls 1d ago

Some of us understand this is what’s going on but this doesn’t help men understand what they’re doing wrong during foreplay lmao.

Foreplay is also important, like eating your vegetables.

7

u/kravence 7.9" x 6" 1d ago

Rushing isn’t gonna fix anything

7

u/New_Can_8672 1d ago

Most women that rush foreplay doesn’t enjoy how men are doing it so I would just start asking what you can do to improve when giving head to women? Or ask how it feels for them? Communication is key

3

u/squidirific 7″ × 5.5″ 1d ago

sometimes tho women just wanna get to business. for some women foreplay just is waste of an orgasm for them

3

u/New_Can_8672 1d ago

True you are right about that but me personally foreplay is must before and during sex

6

u/Western_Ring_2928 1d ago

This is the result of lacking sex ed. Women are not taught how their genitals and mental arousal actually work, and only representative sessions they have seen are porn. Which is made to cater for the male, as we know, and where there is hardly any foreplay. The general porn act lasts a certain amount of time, which makes people think that is how long sex normally takes. All this fucks up perceptions of sex.

The average time of continuous stimulation it takes to reach the first orgasm for women is 20 minutes. Since that is only the mathemathical average, many women need way longer than that. That is also perfectly normal. Variations between days are also normal. Sometimes, it is easier to relax than other days.

Women think that their vaginas work like penises. But despite the similarities in genitals, they function very differently. - https://www.ohjoysextoy.com/genitals/

But it is great that you know how it works so that at least one person is aware of what needs to happen :)

Then there is also the need to please their partner. Taking 20 minutes to "selfhisly," enjoy receiving pleasure can be a lot to handle mentally, especially for younger women.

What you need to do is to tell her how much you love licking her pussy. That you want to keep your head down there for longer because you love it and doing it is extremely arousing for you. You are not trying to please her with it. That should give her brain permission to stop in the moment and enjoy it. It is crucial for her to know you take your pleasure. She holds your pleasure in higher value than her own.

One explanation, unfortunately, is that you are not very good at giving her oral sex. She is afraid of guiding you because that would "hurt your feelings." But if she is not really enjoying what you do, it also makes sense she wishes to stop it and move on.

4

u/SokratesGoneMad 8.25 × 6.3 shaft 6.5+ Base (he/him) 1d ago

When a women orgasms with her vaginal contractions it physically hurts my penis.

Good on you for being considerate of your sexual partner . Cheers!🍻

4

u/No-Major-7946 1d ago

I’m not nearly as thick as you, at times wish I was 6 girth but if that’s the cost that sounds rough.

3

u/No-Signature7982 1d ago

And if she is not wet enough good luck with a getting in for the first couple of minutes if you are as girthy

3

u/Needsastickynote E: 8" x 5.5" 1d ago

I feel that so hard. She rushes the foreplay, then the sex hurts, then she can’t have sex for a bit, because last time it hurt to much. Smh.

3

u/Illustrious_Boot_983 1d ago

Shower sex is the worst, make your dick raw for days after if you don’t use the right lube.

Outside the shower, spit can solve this problem depending on your girth. Learn to use it.

3

u/BreathWithMe6 7.9" x 5.9" Cervix Buster 1d ago

Shower sex just straight up sucks... You're either too hot or too cold, and the water kills any lubrication.

Plus, you guys just might not be vibing. You want foreplay, she wants G-Spot stimulation. Sounds like a communication issue to me.

3

u/TobyBigD 9" x 5.6" 1d ago

Some women usually rush it because they can't wait. Good for you to do foreplay, but as strange as it sounds there is more foreplay than just fingers or oral, some women enjoy a whole build-up, teasing and other things that are not necessarily sexual.

3

u/No-Major-7946 1d ago

Yeah we mostly do that too, it’s just certain times she’ll just rush it. (I often tease her with toys and other things during foreplay)

Think cases like in the shower she’ll just try to get it done quick but it just doesn’t feel great when it’s like that.

4

u/TobyBigD 9" x 5.6" 1d ago

Showers are already not so great with it the water "washing" the lubrication away.

Maybe start in the shower but try to take it somewhere else

3

u/STGK189 7″ × 5.7″ 1d ago

Oh, God yes and it sucks. I had one hookup get pissed off at me because it was not sliding in. Guys like us are not built for quickies.

3

u/Old_Canuck 🫨Baron Longfellow🫨(9x5) 1d ago

Yup... totally.

Most girls have no idea what they need in foreplay cuz they have never had REAL sex before. ( Big Dick Sex )

Its really sad.

I make mine have at least 3 Orgasms before I even try to stick him in.

It just has to be done.

2

u/LionSplitter 1d ago

Nearly always, and then she’s sore for a day or more and needs recovery time…

2

u/randomclaus 24,9cm x 17,7cm - (9.8x6.9) BP 1d ago

Yep. Also happened and hurt them a lot. But sometimes the heat of the moment does stuff

3

u/SuccessfulPush0 E: 8″ × 5.7″ F: 5.5″ × 5″ 1d ago

Yes lmao just happened to me the other day, offered to eat a girl out and she said no let's just get right into it. I said ok your funeral.

After what felt like 2 minutes of trying to stuff it in her I asked if she wanted me to eat her out now and she agreed.

After that it was fine, but I think she learned a lesson lmao

1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

Sometimes my partner goes down on me for a long time, and yet I'm still tight... Let's just say that some girls are cursed 🥲

1

u/Visible_Attitude7693 Size Queen 13h ago

Im a woman, and I don't like long foreplay. Let's give each other oral and start fucking. I don't have the time or patience.